COOL SHIT 4-5-12

DICKS #3: I’m sorry, I said I was not going to talk about this book, but I won’t take up too much of your time. Seriously, just look at the cover. If you don’t find that it’s enough to get you to read this book, then fuck you. Just . . . fuck you.

G.I. JOE: INFESTATION 2 #2: I feel so grossed out that I like something in this stupid INFESTATION cross-over. But . . . I can’t help but like how they’re using characters like Serpentor and Crystal Ball. I’ve never really cared for Storm Shadow, but this issue makes some very good points in his favor. And honestly, GI Joe could have sat this one out. We don’t need them here. Cobra could have done this on their own. Snake Eyes seems to make an obligatory appearance. Anyway, it’s over now. I stand by my opinion of INFESTATION, but I will make an exception for this very small mini-series under its wing.

COBRA COMMAND: G.I. JOE #12: Here we have the aftermath of the most recent IDW series. Cobra Commander has exerted his absolute mastery over the heroin industry that he’s certain to indefinitely fund his terrorist organization. Hawk gets fired, and G.I. Joe gets their funding cut. Things are looking pretty grim for our heroes. Not only that, but everyone thinks Snake Eyes is dead. Us readers know the truth, but still. I can’t wait to see what these guys do with this title next.

THE BOYS #65: This. Is. It. I’ve been waiting for this moment since issue one. This is easily the greatest issue of this book EVER. Butcher vs. the Homelander, except . . . it’s nothing like I thought it would be. The Homelander isn’t quite what he seems, and neither is Black Noir, which is the true surprise. My mind was certainly blown by it, so I don’t want to ruin it for anyone. Those of you who have read this issue know what I’m talking about. I am absolutely shocked that this is not the last issue. All of the conflicts have been resolved. Where the fuck can Ennis go from here? My absolute favorite part is when Butcher breaks down, apologizing to his dead wife for everything that he’s done . . . and even more so, for what he’s ABOUT TO DO. What the fuck is he talking about?! SIX ISSUES TO GO.

COOL SHIT 3-15-12

CROSSED: BADLANDS #1: Garth Ennis returns to the book he launched for Avatar. Once again, we have a new band of survivors, a new group of people to get to know before Ennis ruthlessly murders them. This time out, he runs into a problem he created for Lapham and Spurrier on their series: he has to one-up everything that has come before. Ennis is up to the task; in the most horrifying scene, he has a Crossed driving a car and throwing a living baby at someone. The baby splatters all over the place, and since Jacen Burrows has also returned to illustrate, we get to see the gory results. Good times ahead, folks. Good times.

G.I. JOE: INFESTATION #1: Fuck me. This kind of surprised me. Something good is actually coming from IDW’s stupid INFESTATION cross-over. Cobra finds a Mythos relic and they’re trying to figure out how to use it to kill people. The best part: watching Interrogator go among his patients, insane Cobra soldiers who are no longer fit to serve. Good stuff.

ANGEL AND FAITH #7: So Drusilla is sane for the first time in centuries, and she wants to help Angel forget about all the evil things he’s done in his life, to make him a better person. Angel rebels against the idea, as would any intelligent human being. Who wants to take away things that make one human? Faith’s father has also showed up, and he seems to have good intentions, as he’s been sober for six months. Yet . . . it looks like he has other intentions. Things are getting very interesting here.

LOCKE AND KEY: CLOCKWORKS #5: Now we finally know what turned Dodge into the monster we first met at the bottom of the well. Well, not the whole story, but we know that Rendell used the Head Key on him and removed all memories of the Door. Dodge turns into a complete dick, so much so it hurts. Poor Ellie’s heart is absolutely destroyed because of it. To top things off, Joe Hill throws in another surprise: Rendell’s ghostly mother is hanging out in the well house. Weird. 8 ISSUES TO GO.