I shit you not, I spent five years of my life eating nothing but McDonald's for dinner every night. One year of junior high and all four of high school. In those days I was known for a few things: my desire to be a writer, having read The Stand at least 20 times and having McDonald's for dinner every night. I haven't done that every night since the summer between high school and college, when I dropped 40 lbs in three months. Not bad.
McDonald's is in the headlines these days for two things: trying to come up with an affordable meal deal and changing the way they make their burgers. The affordable meal deal thing is out of their hands. That will never come to pass again unless we crack down on greedflation. But changing the way they make their burgers? That's very noticeable.
The problem is, they want to make gourmet burgers at a fast food joint. They really need to stop tilting at that windmill. No one goes to McDonald's for a good burger. It's impossible. People go there for a good *fast food* burger. And they go there because it's supposed to be cheap. But corporate greed is out of control. These cocksuckers saw the pandemic and saw it as an opportunity to fleece us blind. But that's my usual rant.
This is a different rant. Because I *have* noticed the difference in their burgers, and it's not a good difference. They have somehow made their burgers so bad that I'm no longer interested in eating them. It doesn't help that they've started to put the toppings (please note that they're called TOPpings) on the bottom of the burger patty. You know how I feel about that. But I ask for extra mustard and extra onions these days, and apparently that means no mustard and no onions. Not even on the goddam bottom. I actually have a bunch of pictures of this. I keep meaning to send it to McDonald's to explain to them the error of their ways. I'd post them here, but it's late and it would take too long. Also, I'm not sure what you'd get out of a bunch of pictures of McDonald's cheeseburgers lacking mustard and onions. I don't think anyone who reads me has that fetish. Unless I'm mistaken? DM me if you want 'em that bad.
The only saving grace they have right now is the Quarter Pounder with Cheese. I don't ordinarily eat these things because they're expensive as fuck, but the burgers are decent, and they put the TOPpings on TOP of the burger patty. And they'll actually put extra onions on there. Extra mustard is asking too much.
So I'm thinking about ditching McDonald's after all these decades of patronage. Why would I keep going there if they're going to keep making their food worse? To give you an idea of how much I used to go there, I have the McDonald's app on my phone. I don't like apps. For some reason there's a layer of IP protection (sometimes called "weaponized IP") on corporations' apps but not their websites, and they're practically the same thing. You can use an ad blocker and stop surveillance pricing on a website. If you do that to an app, you've committed a felony and can literally go to prison for it. Jay Saurik calls it "felony contempt of business model." If I'm that much against apps but I have the McDonald's app? That should say something. I sacrificed a little of my morality in the name of McDonald's, and this is how they repay me?
It might be time to say goodbye to fuckin' McDonald's.
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