Friday, January 27, 2017


One of the things I miss about working in the suburbs is the fact that I never had to worry about making my train home after work. It's usually not a major concern, but every once in a while I have to run to get my train. If I miss it, I'm stuck in the city for a whole fucking hour before the next one is ready.

I had to run for my train tonight. I was so pissed because I'd spent the day working up a good buzz due to my company providing free beer and pizza for us. Running totally fucking killed it. I had to ride that train sober because of the physical exertion.

I work in the repair department of a telecom company. I'm in the queue until the pass off to on call happens. It happened late today because a lot of shit was fucked up. I got a call at 8:05, and I had to take it because we didn't do the pass off yet. I got out at 8:20. 8:25 is the latest I can get out of work and make my train. I had to run for at least two blocks to make my train.

I'm OK with that. I'm not in the best of shape, so that sucks, but I can live with it. Except . . . well . . . I had a lot of free beer tonight, and I had to piss. Badly. My back teeth weren't just floating, they were fucking drowning. I had to make a decision tonight: make my train or take a forceful piss.

I chose to make my train. Holy fuck, that run was painful. When I got to my train with 5 minutes to spare, I rushed to the bathroom on the last car and pissed longer than Tom Hanks did in A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN.

I was so late for my train that I had to get a seat on the second level. While I was up there, I realized that just about everyone with me had a beer from the News Room. I'd put that at 95% of the people on the second level. I didn't realize that many people needed a beer for the ride home. I'm very proud of my fellow commuters.

But fuck. On my run I thought I was going to piss my pants. Like, a lot.

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