C2E2 2013: MEETING JOHN SCALZI

Truth be told, I haven’t read a lot of John Scalzi’s books.  I’ve read a few short stories, and I’ve read REDSHIRTS, but for the most part, my main exposure to him has been through his wildly popular blog, WHATEVER.  He’s probably one of the most reasonable, sane people online, and he has an interesting way of dealing with trolls.  When I found out he was going to be at C2E2, I was hoping he’d be doing a signing.  When I got there and found out that he was only going to be doing a panel, I sighed.  Not exactly what I was hoping for, but I would definitely settle for it.  Luckily, it fell between two other panels I’d been planning on, so my schedule wasn’t damaged too much.  Much to my glee, it was announced during the panel that he’d be signing in a half an hour.  Much to my horror, I realized I would be in the Vertigo panel at the time.  I vowed to skip out when it came to the Q&A portion, but I’ll write about why I stuck around that one for the duration in my coverage of this panel.  Suffice it to say, Vertigo ended a bit early.

Unfortunately, it was still going to be tight.  In 15 minutes, the convention floor was going to close.  I had to rush in, find the Anderson’s booth, and hope that the line wasn’t too long.  At the Anderson’s booth, I was then told that he was signing at table 12 in the celebrities section.  I hurried over there only to find table 12 empty.  FUCK!  But wait, there’s Scalzi over at table 13!  I made it, after all!

In fact, he was just signing stock books for Anderson’s by the time I got there.  He very politely invited me to step up, and I asked if he would sign REDSHIRTS for me.  He did, and as he did so, we talked about the awesome panel that he’d done with Alex Hughes.  He said he’d had a lot of fun, and that he’s glad to have had such a good time.

While I spoke with him, I noticed a paperback edition of THE HUMAN DIVISION.  For those who don’t know, he’s been releasing this book in serial format online, charging a small fee for each part.  It’s scheduled to be published in one print volume later this year, and it blew my mind that it was just there on his table.  I asked if he was selling it early, and he said no, it was just a promotional thing.  It took everything in my power to not pick it up and at least leaf through it.

Some people say he’s kind of abrasive, but he was probably the most affable guy I met at the convention this year.  He couldn’t have been nicer to me, and also to his fellow panelist, Alex Hughes.  Hughes is fairly new to all of this (I wouldn’t be surprised to find that this was her first panel ever), and even though she seemed a bit nervous, Scalzi did his best to put her at ease.

I felt bad that I hadn’t heard of Hughes before all of this, and she was sitting next to Scalzi at the signing.  Those who know me know I’m always open to books I haven’t tried, so I asked her for the first book in her series, and it seems pretty awesome.  It’s about a telepathic junkie in the distant future facing off against a serial killer who murders people with his mind.

Things were winding down at that time.  I was going to mention the issue of SUBTERRANEAN that Scalzi had edited, but I didn’t think I had the time.  I was going to jokingly mention that he’d rejected my story for it, but truth be told, I wound up reading the magazine, and my story wouldn’t have fit in with everything else in there.  He was right to turn me down.  [Incidentally, that story was “Amber” and can be read in my new book, TALES OF QUESTIONABLE TASTE.]

Scalzi and Hughes are excellent people, and if you have the chance to meet them, I would recommend it.  If they’re ever on another panel again, and if you have the chance to attend, don’t skip it.  You’ll regret it for a long time to come.

C2E2 PANEL: FUTURISTIC FRIGHT: SCIENCE-FICTION NOVELISTS IMAGINE FAR-FUTURE WORLDS

That’s a mouthful of a title. Sadly, this panel didn’t quite turn out to be about that. It was still a great time, but they went waaaaay off topic.



The guests were SF writers John Scalzi and Alex Hughes, and they were mediated by a woman whose name I didn’t get, and no amount of internet searching is helping me find it. I think she was a representative of Penguin USA, but for the life of me, I can’t recall her name, and it’s not in my notes.


They were off to a good start when Scalzi admitted his distaste, at least when it comes to his own work, for dystopian futures. He much prefers to take a philosophical approach to SF. He spoke for a while on the Cartesian separation of body and mind, and about the nature of being able to download your personality to a recording, mind-blowing things like that.


At one point, the mediator introduced the idea of space fantasy verses SF. It could have been an interesting discussion, but it veered off on another course. I think they were trying to promote the idea that stuff like STAR WARS was not SF but space fantasy, which is close but distinctly different. They didn’t discuss it, or far futures, for very long.


It wasn’t long before the panel was just another SF panel. That’s not to say it wasn’t fun (SF panels usually are pretty awesome), but it was no longer specialized.


One of the big topics discussed is the use of actual science in TV shows and movies. Few know this, but Scalzi was an advisor for STARGATE SG-U. In his time on that show, he noticed something: keep your scientific explanations simple and vague. Since SF uses a lot of theoretical science, there are no definite answers. If you find a middle-ground, you should be good. You’ll then get two responses: non-SF people simply won’t care, it’ll sound good enough to them; SF people, on the other hand, will puzzle over it for a while and come up with their own explanation, which will always be better than the one you devised yourself. Brilliant, really.


The STAR TREK reboot kind of got to him. He generally liked the movie, but when Spock was describing the thing with the star exploding, Scalzi just couldn’t take it. He hates hearing the usual clichés, like reversing the polarity. “Be happy with the polarity you were born with,” he said.


He was full of good one liners, my favorite being about having enough power to explode galaxies. “Why not destroy a few galaxies? For the lulz.”


He was in a really good mood, cheerful, full of jokes and great observations. Sorry, fellow LORD OF THE RINGS fans, but he turned me on one subject: I’ve always said the books are better. While I enjoyed the movies, the books will always be the true LotR. Scalzi disagrees. He says that Tolkien was really good at creating this world with vast detail, even going so far as to write THE SILMARILLION, but he just wants to sit back and relax in this world, structure be damned. Peter Jackson had the common sense to focus all of these details and histories and everything into a story. Being a purist, I hated to admit that he was right. I’ve always miss the real ending of LotR, when the hobbits return to the Shire only to find Saruman has taken over and they have to defeat him to save their home. No one has ever put that into their adaptation except for the Mind’s Eye radio play. Well, I guess there’s a reason, but it upsets me whenever people leave it out. I have to give this one up, folks. There is no reason for that part to be in LotR. Jackson was right to cut it out. In fact, Jackson’s LotR is the best form of that story.


Scalzi made an interesting point with that last bit. Two more examples he used are JAWS and THE GODFATHER. The movies are the best versions of those particular stories. Not that the books were bad, they just weren’t as good. It’s a hard concept for us purists to get over, but I have to admit that he’s right.


As charming as Scalzi was, Hughes was nervous. She conducted herself really well, but the unfortunate thing is, I’m pretty sure no one in the room knew who she was. (I certainly didn’t. I bought her book, but I haven’t gotten to it yet.) As a result of this, no one asked her any questions. It got to the point where the mediator and Scalzi both asked the audience to offer up some questions for Hughes. I hate to say this, because I really liked Hughes, but the only question she got from the crowd was akin to a pity question, kind of like an adult condescending to a kid. It wasn’t meant to be that way, but that’s how it came off.


All in all, it was a successful outing. We all had a good time, a few laughs, and a few insights into the world of SF.