MAD SAM DESTEFANO: PRE-EMINENT CLOWN PRINCE OF THE CHICAGO OUTFIT

 [NOTE: This is not a new piece. I wrote this a long time ago when a friend was putting together a true crime podcast. That podcast never came to fruition, which is a shame, but I thought the piece I wrote for it was too interesting to not release into the wild. So here you go. Enjoy, if that's the correct word for it.]

“The mob was full of psychopaths and morons, and keeping order among them was a challenge to the mettle of any boss, be he an elderly don like Paul Ricca, or a power broker like Giancana. Nobody tested the patience and discipline of both men more than Sam DeStefano, a freelance juice-loan operator and terrorist who was the pre-eminent clown prince of the Chicago outfit, a buffoon with no equal . . . DeStefano through the years had somehow gained the favor of Ricca and Giancana, a standing that kept him alive. For nobody made more enemies, or talked louder, than DeStefano, the mad hatter.”

                        --William Brashler, The Don: The Life and Death of Sam Giancana

 

Make no mistake. Samuel “Mad Sam” DeStefano was a scary guy. He carved out a neat little niche for himself as a loan shark by also ensuring that everyone knew he was a sociopath and a lunatic and very unpredictable. One minute you could be having a normal conversation with him, and the next you could have an ice pick in your throat. Or somewhere a lot less pleasant.

 

But where did such a killer come from? Oddly enough, he hails from Streator, IL, where he was one of seven children born to Samuel DeStefano, Sr., and Rosalie Brasco. Streator, now, is a farming community with a dab of city living. Back then it was just a farming community. Not a lot to do there. It’s not a surprise that the family picked up stakes and moved across the state to Herrin in coal country. What happened, then, to make them move to Little Italy in Chicago?

 

The Herrin Massacre, naturally. The miners were on strike, and at first things were amicable, but when the price of coal went up the owner hired scabs to take over. The union boys were upset over this, so they started to shoot at the scabs. The mine had armed guards, so they started killing the miners in retaliation. Add in some strike breakers, and you have more corpses. They even got the superintendent. Twenty of the scabs and strike breakers were killed compared to the three miners. Twenty-three men died over this labor dispute, and not all of them were merely shot. Some were brutally killed.

 

“The only way to free the county of strike breakers is to kill them all off and stop the breed.” Imagine being told that by a striking miner, and you’re a strike breaker. You’ve walked out under a white flag, and then you and your men are attacked. Brutalized. Murdered.

 

“Listen, don’t you go killing these fellows on a public highway. There are too many women and children and witnesses around to do that. Take them over in the woods and give it to them. Kill all you can.” Chilling words. But that’s what they did.

 

“Let’s see how fast you can run between here and Chicago, you damned gutter-bums!” One of the miners said this  as they set loose a bunch of strike breakers at a fence. Keep in mind, Herrin is closer to Springfield than Chicago. If you’re not from Illinois, that’s all the way across the state.

 

Some strike breakers were caught at the fence—a barbed wire fence—and shot. Some were shot trying to escape beyond the fence. One was captured and hanged from a tree. Three of his companions were shot just under his twisting soon-to-be corpse. Some of them were captured and stripped to their unmentionables and forced to crawl to the cemetery. The miners beat and shot and urinated on these men. Townspeople came to taunt these men, and anyone still alive at the end of the trek had their throats cut with a pocket knife. And not even death could stop the abuse. The miners spat on their corpses.

 

The rest of the country wasn’t happy with this. It horrified everyone outside of Herrin. Some compared it to how the Germans in WWI comported themselves with their POWs. President Harding supposedly said, “[It is a] shocking crime [of] barbarity, butchery, rot and madness.” If he didn’t say that, he probably should have.

 

Not a single miner did time for this crime. Arrests were made, but everyone was acquitted. The bodies were buried in unmarked graves, and it took us as long as 2013 to find them. There’s a monument to the dead there now, which eases the sensation of being brutally murdered, no doubt.

 

Mad Sam’s dad was one of those miners. It’s not clear that he took part in the massacre, but Sam wasn’t the only member of the family affected by this crime. His brother, Mario, was also a sadist. This part is speculation, but it seems pretty clear that Mad Sam’s sociopathy began here. Some of his crimes do, in fact, mirror what happened to the strike breakers.

 

The FBI thought of Mad Sam as the most vicious torturer/killer in the history of the US. The mob used him when they needed to send a sadistic message, but even they felt uneasy about using him. He did, after all, murder his own brother, Michael. Charles Crimaldi, a mobster who somehow survived to 2020, claimed Mad Sam was a Satan worshipper. How did it all begin?

 

The first record of him being arrested comes from 1926, but it was because he had escaped from a jail in Niles, so there was at least one crime he committed before that we didn’t know about. Shortly after he was handed back to Niles, his gang showed up threatening to kill anyone who stood in their way of freeing Mad Sam. It’s not clear if this worked, but not long after that Mad Sam got arrested again, this time for kidnapping a woman off the street, taking her to a garage, and—with six other men—sexually assaulting her. She was seventeen. Mad Sam was found guilty and sentenced to three years.

 

Just three years for the sexual assault of a minor.

 

When he got out he joined the Forty-Two Gang. If that sounds familiar, it’s because it was run by the infamous Sam Giancana, who went on to run the mob in Chicago for many decades. It was 1930, so they mostly got up to bootlegging, gambling, women, that kind of thing. Throw in some light robbery, and you get the idea. He was wounded during a grocery store heist. He had several bullet wounds when he showed up at the hospital, and he didn’t feel the need to explain them. It doesn’t seem that he got arrested for that one.

 

(It should be mentioned that by this time he married his girlfriend (Anita) and would have six kids by her. He was very abusive to all of them, especially his wife. For her disobedience, he would often rape her. His kids all went into hiding and refused to come back to the world until after his death.)

 

He did get caught for the next one. In 1933 he tried to rob a bank and got 40 years for it. Think about that. He robbed a bank and got 40 years. He raped a minor and got three years for that. The world had a different set of priorities then.

 

He didn’t serve his whole sentence. The governor inexplicably commuted it in 1944. Not that it mattered. He returned to prison in 1947 for, of all things, having fake sugar ration stamps. (Remember, this was just after WWII.)

 

While in Leavenworth he met Paul Ricca and Louis Campagna, who would help him get in with the mob. He was released the same year and got a job in waste management, like any good li’l mobster. He didn’t tell them about his criminal record, and when they discovered it they got upset but didn’t have him arrested.

 

And then his real life of crime began.

 

It turns out that he managed to steal that money from the bank job, and he used it to set himself up as a loan shark. He also became big in real estate, buying an apartment building which he used to squeeze money out of people. He used that money to bribe people from judges to alderman to anyone in between. He paid off cops to ignore crimes to the point where he used twenty grand to dismiss a Murder One charge. Assault cost $1,500, robbery $800. (Incidentally, he guaranteed acquittal. If it didn’t happen, he would pay for the appeals himself.)

 

What was the vig? 20-25%. That’s insane. But the mob loved it. But he didn’t want people to pay him back. He had a sound-proof basement where he would bring those who couldn’t make the cut where he could torture them to death. Even if the sum was small. Especially if the sum was small. He liked scaring people, and some mobsters claimed he foamed at the mouth while torturing people to death. More on that in a moment.

 

He would often give personalized gifts to people who borrowed from, engraved with his name, to prove to police that he couldn’t have killed them. He liked them. Why else would he give them gifts? The ploy seemed to have worked. He never did time for killing those people. He would also wear super thick glasses to make people think he couldn’t see without them. He could. He wanted people to underestimate him, and they did constantly. Until he killed them.

 

Giancana and other mobsters invested in Mad Sam’s business practices. They didn’t like him, but he made them a lot of money, so why not? Once he even attacked a Chicago Tribune journalist.

 

William Doherty was the writer in question. He wrote something bad about Sam in the paper, so Sam decided to chase him with a gun, threaten his family and then damage property at Doherty’s home.

 

And then there’s Leo Foreman, one of Sam’s collectors. He was technically a real estate agent, but you know how that goes. They had a major argument in Foreman’s office, and Foreman had Sam kicked out forcibly. Realizing with horror the grave mistake he’d just made, Foreman went into hiding. Crimaldi (what a great name for a criminal!) and the infamous Tony Spilotro reached out to Foreman claiming that Sam wanted to “let bygones be bygones” and wanted to see him. It’s kind of like being a prince in the Roman Empire and having the emperor recall you to Milan. Nothing good is going to come of it.

 

Foreman fell for it and was murdered at Sam’s brother, Mario’s, house. Sam’s men softened him up first with a vigorous beating and shooting him in a few non-vital places, and when Sam got to him, he used a hammer on Foreman. His knees, his head, his crotch, his ribs. He stabbed him with his beloved ice pick twenty times. By the time he shot Foreman in the head, Foreman probably took it as a blessing. The whole time he was killing Foreman, Sam kept telling him that he was a blood sacrifice to the devil. When he was done killing him, Sam said, “Look. He’s got a smile on his face. Looks like he was glad to die.”

 

And then there is Peter Cappelletti, yet another of Sam’s collectors. Somehow he messed up worse than Foreman. He ripped Sam off for twenty-five grand and fled to Wisconsin. Sam’s men had no problem finding him, and they brought him back home. Sam chained him to a radiator in the basement of a banquet hall and tortured him for three days. WHILE BANQUETS WERE STILL BEING HELD. But that was no problem. The place was owned by his brother, Mario. At one point he set Cappelletti on fire, and the poor man screamed for them to kill him, to put him out of his misery. “Please!” he cried. “I’m on fire!”

 

“Then we need to put the fire out,” Sam said. He had his men drag him out into the middle of a banquet, where Cappelletti’s family was having dinner. Mad Sam had planned it by inviting them there in the first place and treating them to a meal. He made the family urinate on him at the same time, just to put that fire out.

 

Not surprisingly, the family coughed up the dough.

 

If that’s not crazy enough, he tried to represent Vito Zaccagonini during his forgery trial. There is no evidence that Sam had any knowledge of the law outside of breaking it. He also represented himself several times. His tactics could be described as “shock and awe.” Or more like, “What the hell is this guy doing?” He liked to be brought into court in a wheelchair or on a stretcher. He once asked the jury, “Have you ever seen an elephant?” Then, without any pause, he changed his plea to guilty on the spot. He claimed that “something had come to light that I had not known before.” What was he on trial for? A mere disorderly conduct charge. They fined him a hundred bucks. How’s that for punishment? His courtroom antics at his own trials gained a lot of public attention, especially when he started showing up in his PJs. He liked to ramble his arguments through a bullhorn. There is actually footage of this if you look it up on YouTube.

His victims weren’t limited to people who owed him money. His brother, Michael, had a drugs and gambling problem, and the mob called Sam to get Michael out of their casino. He went out to the there and picked Michael up only to shoot him five times in the head. IN HIS OWN CAR. (Another variation of the story states that he stabbed his brother, probably with an ice pick.) He went to his other brother, Mario’s, place, where he stripped the body down, washed it, put it in another car and left it abandoned on a city street. He then had the nerve to call the police to tell them where Michael could be found.

 

He liked to go to pig farms to watch them at work for hours. He claimed he wanted to own a pig farm so he could feed them his victims Mason Verger-style. He also liked to tell a story, and Crimaldi confirmed it, that he once forced his wife to put a gun in her mouth. He told her to pull the trigger, and when she did, he laughed and told her he’d taken the bullets out. He thought it was an amusing anecdote that his mob buddies would enjoy.

 

Few, if any, did.

 

Famed FBI Agent William F. Roemer wrote a book about his adventures, and Sam played kind of a big role. He said this of Sam: “About this time I got to know Mad Sam DeStefano, the worst torture-murderer in the history of Chicago. He was a sadistic, arrogant, swaggering thug of the worst order, responsible for scores of killings, almost all by his own hands. I had a long series of confrontations with this beast, and looking back I must admit I enjoyed every one.” He visited Sam at his home many times in an attempt to turn him into an informant, and a lot of the time he said that Sam came downstairs in his pajamas with his penis hanging out like it was some kind of accident. Perhaps he did this for the same reason that Lyndon B. Johnson held press conferences while he defecated: intimidation. Roemer always had Sam’s coffee, and it had an odd taste to it. Sam claimed it was due to the “special Italian coffee beans.” Roemer later learned it was actually because Sam had been urinating into it. Roemer said he “could never drink coffee again.”

 

If you follow mob history in Chicago, you might know about a dirty cop by the name of Tommy Dorso. He helped Sam deal drugs back in the day, and he once said that Sam rolled around on the floor, mouth foaming, praying to Satan. “I’m your servant! Command me!” he would howl. Dorso himself said of Sam, “DeStefano is not normal. Mentally, physically or spiritually . . . and he knows it.” Crimaldi had this to add: “[Sam] was convinced that he was indeed Satan’s disciple. When he was in trouble or getting heat . . . he would drop to his knees and pray. The ritual was always preceded by a violent rage during which he would stomp the floor and swear endlessly. He seemed to lose contact with the world around him and his anger propelled him through a series of spasms into some private hell where only he and the devil could enter. On all fours he would smash his fists against the floor in frustration and rage. The drool would pour from his mouth in streams to form frothy puddles beneath his face. His gravelly voice would become a croak so guttural that his words were barely comprehensible. Once he had reached this state, he would pray to the devil.”

 

What would a guy like Mad Sam do in his leisure time, aside from visiting pig farms? One time he saw a Black man walking down the street and forced him into his car at gunpoint. He brought the stranger home (to Sam’s place, not the stranger’s) and forced poor Anita DeStefano to perform oral sex on this man. It destroyed him so badly that he actually fled from the house to the nearest precinct to report what had just happened. When the cops investigated and discovered that Mad Sam was behind the whole thing, nothing really happened to him. Even the police were scared of him.

 

An informant, possibly Crimaldi, also called Sam egomaniacal. His house had a lot of mirrors on the walls, and when he talked to people, he looked at his own reflection instead of at them. He would do the same while simply walking on his own. He could be laughing one moment and crying the next. He also claimed that if he hadn’t been “framed” for rape when he was younger, he could have been the President of the United States.

 

Also in his house, down in a soundproofed basement, he had a torture chamber. A wooden cabinet on the wall contained his favorite weapons: ice picks. He liked to shove them into eyes and crotches, and he did that often. Just ask a man named Artie Adler, who died in just such a way before Mad Sam dumped his body in a sewer drain. The cops found it because the sewer backed up, and sanitation had to unblock it. Since the crime had happened during the winter, Adler’s body was in a block of ice, preserved just like a wooly mammoth’s might be.

 

At one point after this killing, Roemer went to visit Sam, who came down in his PJs with his penis hanging out, as usual. This time Sam went to one of the many mirrors in his living room to hold and admire his penis while talking with Roemer. When Roemer accused Sam of killing Adler, Sam brought his whole family into the room. Sam screamed, “These two gentlemen are FBI agents. They have come out here to accuse me of killing Arthur Adler! I cry out to God up above! If I am guilty of killing Arthur Adler, may God come down, right now, and put cancer in the eyeballs . . . of you and you and you!” Pointing his finger to each of his family members.

 

In 1965 Mad Sam went back to prison, this time for conspiracy. Three to five years. In 1972 he went back to prison yet again, this time for threatening the life of none other than Crimaldi himself. In the very same year he was indicted yet again for illegal possession of firearms by a felon.

 

And then another indictment was handed down, this one for Foreman’s murder. He continued with his courtroom lunacy until finally, after all these years, Tony Accardo, the boss of the Chicago mob, decided that Mad Sam had gone too far. He gave Mad Sam’s own crew permission to whack him.

 

April 14, 1973. On the 1600 N. Sayre Ave. block. Mario Anthony DeStefano, the brother who hosted Foreman’s murder, invited his brother over. Sam went, not suspecting a thing. Never imagining that Spilotro would be there, too, and that Spilotro would shotgun him. He got Sam in the chest with one shot and tore his left arm off with the second. Mad Sam DeStefano died instantly.

 

Another variation of the story is that Mario and Spilotro arrived at Sam’s house, who let them into his garage, at which point Spilotro pulled the shotgun from under his coat. The first shot took off his right arm, and the second exploded his chest. One way or the other, he was finally, irrevocably, dead.

Not surprisingly, no one ever went to trial for it. Everyone in Chicago probably released a big sigh of relief knowing that Sam’s reign of terror was finally over. To quote an unnamed mobster, “[Sam] was sick. Crazy, sick, a sick dog, worse than you can ever think. We didn’t whack him a second too soon.”

GOODNIGHT, FUCKERS #199: GOOD WORK, CHICAGO

Short one tonight, folks. Sorry.


I'd heard a lot of horror stories from friends and even family members about a Chicago commute. When I first started doing this thing I figured it would be par for the course. Now that I'm a month and a week in, I have to say: GOOD WORK CHICAGO.


There are a lot of attractive people on my morning commute (men and women and everyone else), and I'm proud to say that I haven't seen a single incident of catcalling. People told me this kind of thing was out of control. Maybe in other cities, but not here. I have yet to see it, and that makes me proud of Chicago.


I don't say that often. I live in a place where it's pretty common to get shot. I hate the city. Every day I slog my way to the office is a day I despise. I only do it because I like my job, and it pays pretty well. I'm a suburbs kind of guy. I don't walk fast, and I don't lose myself in my phone. I walk slow, and if I pass someone I say hi. The city is everything I stand against.


And yet today I'm proud of you, Chicago. I hope your choice of sports team wins something important. (And you don't decide to riot in the streets if that happens. Just take it decently and not roll over anyone's car. Please and thank you.)


Of course I probably just jinxed myself, so . . . goodnight.

GOODNIGHT, FUCKERS #179: THE ONLY WAY TO SEE AMERICA

I recently got a new job, and it's in the city. Paying for parking is absolutely insane, though. My only option: become a train commuter. I'm starting on Tuesday, so I decided to take a practice run today so I know where I'm going when I do it for real.


I've been on trains before but only as a child. I went to the train station in Elmhurst and got on a Chicago bound train. I craned my neck to watch out the window. What did I see? America. Seriously. I think I need to ride one of these things cross-country just to see what else America has to offer.


I saw my neighborhood in a different light, and then I moved beyond it. I saw forgotten buildings with more broken windows than intact windows. I saw warehouses. I saw truck depots. I saw a place where they store Dumpsters. I saw bridges with graffiti. I saw creeks surrounded by woods where underage teens and indigents undoubtedly smoke weed and get drunk. And I saw the city, both the ugly and the beautiful. Holy shit, my train ride should have had a soundtrack by REM. "Driver 8" is perfect for this shit. Or maybe Marcy Playground's "Memphis."


Aside from the stops there is nothing good to be seen from a train. These are the forgotten places. The abandoned places. The lost places. I feel the soul that used to be here and see only the shell of what remains.


It's the ghost of America. May it rest in peace.

HEY FUCKERS #23: ALL PACKED UP AND READY TO GO

I'm all packed up and ready to go to the Printer's Row Lit Fest this weekend (and, of course, the new Bizarro Hour at G-Mart Comics on Saturday night). Two big boxes and one small box, all full of books, magazines and other wonders. You should see the box Shamus and Erika at Rooster Republic sent me. It weighs a shit-ton, and it's completely full of amazing books. When the fest is over, I'll be half-tempted to say that I shipped it back, but it must have gotten lost in the mail. (Heh.)


Seriously, I haven't seen so many StrangeHouse books in one place, not even at the horror shows when I worked their booth. Plus, there's a lot of Rooster Republic titles in there. If you're going to the fest, and you haven't gotten any of these books yet, you're going to need to stop by our table, which is 205/207 in Q2. I don't know where that is, specifically, but that's where I'll be this Saturday and Sunday with some kick ass writers, eager to sell some books.


This box is so fucking heavy, though, that I want it to weigh a lot less when I take it back home with me. A LOT. It is my mission to sell so many of these books that I can carry the box for blocks without it bothering me. I want to make it so that it weighs three-quarters less than what it weighs now before this weekend is through. Not just because I have a broken tailbone and shouldn't be lifting heavy things, but also because dammit, I want these writers to make some money and get some recognition.


As it turns out, all my books sold out at Texas Frightmare, so none of the books that were included in the package were TALES OF QUESTIONABLE TASTE or POOR BASTARDS AND RICH FUCKS. I'm supplying my own copies for the show. That's what's in the one small box I mentioned before. The other big box, though?


Here's the deal. I have fourteen of my own books with me. I also have fourteen incentive packages. If you buy my book (either of them), I will give you one of these packages for FREE. FREEEEEEEEEEEE. These packages include all three issues of my old genre fiction magazine, TABARD INN, in addition to two bumper stickers I used to sell back in those days (PUSSY SATISFIES and IT'S A PARASITE NOT A CHOICE) and the brand new Bruni/Danger US presidential bumper sticker. All of that for free with the purchase of one of my books.


Hell. If you're still at the show near the end of the day on Sunday, and I have some of these packages left, stop by and I'll give 'em to you, no strings attached, just so I don't have to take that giant fucking box home with me. But don't count on that. I might just sell all my books and not have any packages left.


Or if you want to be a cheap bastid, come out for the Bizarro Hour, and I'll give away free issues of TABARD INN just for showing up. It'll just be single issues, not the packages, though.


Bottom line: I want to go home with zero boxes. I'm a realist, and I'm going to just have to accept that it's probably not going to happen. I don't want to come home with any incentive packages, though. And I will consider it a failure if I haven't reduced the RRP box to a quarter of its size. Help me make this happen.


By the way, I've been told that book prices are $10 each. $25 if you buy three. Those are some great prices. I hope to see you all there, and I hope you all take it easy on my broken tailbone. Thanks for reading!

THE BIZARRO HOUR RETURNS!

Are you going to be in the Chicagoland area on June 6? Do you like horror and bizarro? Then come on down to G-Mart Comics and listen to a bunch of us mad fuckers read crazy shit. Did you miss our previous show? You can watch what happened here. If you can't make it, I'm sure we'll be live-streaming it again, so stay tuned for more information. And if you're so inclined, join us for the Printers Row Lit Fest on June 6 and 7. You should see the giant box of books Rooster Republic shipped to me for the show. I hope to see you all there.

SAME RULES APPLY: My thoughts on FILTH

I’ve been a fan of Irvine Welsh’s work for a while. My favorite of his books was GLUE . . . until I found FILTH. This book didn’t just blow my mind, it raped it and left it full of its vile cum. To those of you who have read this book, you’ll know what I mean when I was disappointed to learn that it was going to be turned into a movie. It’s next to impossible to adapt the book. A good portion of it is narrated by the protagonist’s tapeworm, for fuck’s sake. I was even more disappointed when I learned that James McAvoy was going to be Bruce Robertson. I like McAvoy, but I didn’t think he could pull something like this off.

But you know . . . the idea of FILTH being a movie somewhere out there kind of appealed to me. The more I thought about it, the more I had to see it. I had to see if they could even come close to the book. Because the main character is an absolute cunt. Maybe “cunt” is too kind a word for him.

Not surprisingly, there was no big screen release in the US. It’s purely a Scottish movie. With a protagonist like Bruce? It would not have done well here. But I’m very thankful that Irvine Welsh took it to the big screen at the Music Box in Chicago on June 20, 2014. You bet your ass I was there.

AND I LOVED THE MOVIE.

I was completely wrong about McAvoy. He put in the performance of his life. No one else could have done it.

To those who don’t know, Bruce Robertson is a cop who has a hard-on for a promotion in his department. There are rivals for the position, and he does his absolute best to torpedo them. He sets them up for disaster after disaster, and he manipulates them against one another, all in his attempt to move up in his career.

And why does he want to be a cop? A “friend,” Bladesy, asks him this very question. He answers “police oppression.” “You wanted to stamp it out from the inside?” his friend asks. “No, I wanted to be a part of it.”

Oh yes, and Bruce is making harassing phone calls to Bladesy’s wife, just so he can pretend to investigate it, all in the name of successfully having phone sex with her by tricking her into playing along with the perpetrator.

There is no level of depravity Bruce won’t fall to. He’s also fucking the wife of one of his rivals on the force, and he pretends to be the shoulder to cry on when the guy says he thinks the ol’ bird is cheating on him. Not to mention the underage girl he finds with an older boy. She’s the daughter of an important man, and he promises not to tell her father . . . if she sucks his dick.

Bruce fills his body with booze and drugs, and he exercises his every sexual whim, including masturbating at work. He hates everyone and sabotages them all. Look up “misanthrope” in the dictionary, and you’ll find a picture of him.

Except . . . he’s not all that bad. If he were, FILTH would be unwatchable. No one wants to watch some asshole shit all over everyone for an hour and a half. Like any fascinating, complex characters, he has reasons for being the way he is. In one pivotal scene, he tells a rival that he was once a good man. She tells him she’d heard that. And then, of course, he has to completely alienate her to drive away any moment of slight kindness.

There is the incident involving his brother in his youth. And then there is his family. Oh, his poor family. Those who read the book know what I’m getting at.

McAvoy understands the character down to his core. He becomes Bruce Robertson, not just the lunatic bastard, but also the broken man, the man who believes he is such utter filth that he needs to make sure the rest of the world understands this and never gives him a break. It’s very easy to think of the end of Robert Browning’s poem, “Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came” when thinking of Bruce: “the last of me, a living frame/for one more picture!”

FILTH is a funny movie. Incredibly funny, even in moments where some people would be shocked. For example, earlier in the movie, a kid with a balloon gives Bruce the finger for no reason. So Bruce takes the balloon from the kid’s hand and lets it float away in the wind. Then, to cement the incident, he gives the kid the finger with both hands. No one would ever condone such behavior, but it’s fucking funny.

Another example: Bruce sets up a dick measuring contest at the workplace holiday party. All the guys go to the copier, scan it, and put it up on the board. The ladies then have to match the dick to the dude. When it’s Bruce’s turn, he hits the ENLARGE button over and over again, just so he can trick the office slut into letting him fuck her, which she does. She begs for his monster cock, and when he puts it in, there is a massively disappointed look on her face. Again, it’s a horrifying scene . . . yet incredibly funny.

But FILTH is also an incredibly sad movie. Bruce is deeply damaged, and he can’t help but take it out on the world. Bladesy, who confesses to Bruce that Bruce is his best friend, gets it the worst. They go on vacation together, and Bruce torments him the whole time. He drugs his drinks and sets him loose on the town, but when Bladesy’s trip turns bad, Bruce abandons him to save his own trip from going bad. In another scene, Bladesy gives him a Christmas gift of top-shelf Scotch. Bruce pretends that he’s going to share it; he pours himself a glass, and then in Bladesy’s glass, he pours some of the cheap shit he keeps around. In yet another scene, unprovoked, Bruce steals Bladesy’s glasses and breaks them before throwing them into the river.

It’s hard to empathize with Bruce. But somehow this movie pulls it off. By the end, you will feel very bad for Bruce. While he is indeed a misanthrope, he is also a walking tragedy. He is an unbalanced man, and he knows it. And he knows he can never be cured.

Those who have read the book will probably wonder how well director and co-screenwriter (with Welsh) Jon S. Baird handled certain integral parts of the book. In regards to the twist: Baird did wonderfully. He came up with an interesting cinematic way of taking care of it.

The tapeworm? Honestly, I liked the tapeworm in the book better. Baird went in another direction, but I respect what he did. I wouldn’t have been satisfied with anything anyone tried, but this was the best anyone could have done. The movie is sometimes interrupted by scenes with Bruce visiting a mad psychiatrist played by Jim Broadbent. There are paintings of tapeworms on his office walls, in case you didn’t figure out that he was supposed to represent the tapeworm. Broadbent goes over the top with his performance. One look in his eyes, and you’ll be convinced you’re in the presence of a psychotic.

The ending? It’s basically the same. The last line of the film makes it slightly different, but I don’t have a problem with it.

I can’t recommend this movie enough. I think it’s edged its way into my top ten favorites. When it comes out on DVD, I’ll be among the first to buy it. For those who can’t wait, you can rent it on Amazon for $6.99. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t advise anyone to pay that much for something you’re not going to own, but in this case, I would say it’s worth the money.

If you’re really lucky, though, the Music Box will have another screening. Don’t count on it, though.

C2E2 2013: THE NEW 52 PANEL

All right, this was the panel I was least interested in.  I don’t care much for DC (just like I don’t care much for Marvel).  I only read their books when it’s a character I love (which is rare), or if a book is written by a writer I respect.  Not surprisingly, it was the most overcrowded panel I attended at the con.  Standing room only.

You know why I went there.  I have only 2 DC interests, and believe you me, these days they are waning.  I didn’t even know who most of the panelists were.  I recognized Peter Tomasi, Bob Harras, and Doug Mahnke, but I had to resort to the internet to identify the others as Bobbie Chase, Charles Soule, Sterling Gates, Kyle Higgins, Aaron Kuder, and Patrick Gleason.

(Before I go any further, I should mention a pretty decent thing the DC folks are doing:  We Can Be Heroes.  It’s an Indiegogo charity to fight hunger.  They’ve raised more than 2 million so far.  You can get some pretty cool stuff, like exclusives, special editions, extras, all sorts of stuff.  If you buy these things, DC matches your donation.  Not bad, eh?)

Anyway, I didn’t really care much about what their topics, for the most part.  They say there are no plans for a new Robin just yet, but then they hinted that there might be a new Robin soon.  You know, the usual Big Two bullshit.  In the meantime, they’re portraying Batman going through the five stages of grief, and at the same time, it looks like Nightwing has moved to Chicago.  That got a cheer out of the room.  It would seem that the guy who killed Dick Grayson’s parents is still alive and living under an assumed name.  Nightwing is in Chicago hunting him down.  The villain sounds like a SAW ripoff.  That could be cool, but ultimately, it’s not a thing for me.  Oh yeah, and the new Batwing is the son of Lucius Fox.  They also talked about SUPERMAN UNCHAINED, which is coming out the Wedneday just before the new Superman movie is released.  Scott Snyder is writing that one, but hell.  It’s Superman.  I can’t bring myself to care.

The stuff I was there for:  John Constantine and Jonah Hex, of course.  It would seem that the DC writers have been planning something called the Trinity War in the Justice League books from the start of the New 52, and that includes JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK, for some reason.  It involves Pandora and the Phantom Stranger.  I kind of like the Phantom Stranger, but he does not need his own book.  Am I the only one saying that?  Guys like him can’t have their own books.  They need to be enigmatic, showing up in other people’s books from time to time.  If you give him his own book, he loses all of that shit.  Besides, constant exposure to him will eventually wear thin.

ANYWAY . . . the new SWAMP THING writer has a few plans for John Constantine outside of the Trinity War.  He goes to a small town in Scotland that has grown something called a Whiskey Tree (and I don’t know what that is, but it sounds like I might be reading that issue of SWAMP THING).

And then there’s ALL-STAR WESTERN.  You know how recently I was gleeful that we were finally getting Hex back to his western roots?  And then he teamed up with Booster fucking Gold?  Well, I’m about to get even more disappointed with the series.  Coming soon, Hex will be TIME TRAVELING TO MODERN TIMES.  Oh yeah, and while he’s in the 21^st Century, he’ll be GOING BACK TO GOTHAM CITY.  Motherfucker!  Are you shitting me?  Do you remember the last time Hex time traveled?  We got stuck with fucking HEX.  How well did that work out?  It was canceled after 18 issues (which was 18 too many, if you ask me).  I can only assume that we’ll be losing this book pretty soon.

One of the last things they talked about was a free guide that will be coming out at the end of the month in comic book stores everywhere.  It’s a list of all the DC graphic novels and the suggested order you should read them in.

I didn’t have the stomach to stick around for the Q&A session, I was that disgusted.  At least they gave me a copy of BATMAN #701 for free.  It was actually a pretty good read, but since it was written by Grant Morrison, I wasn’t that surprised.

WIZARD WORLD INTERVIEWS PART FOUR

Apologies to my other subjects, but this interview is my favorite. When we found Brian Azzarello, writer of 100 BULLETS, LOVELESS, LEX LUTHOR: MAN OF STEEL, JOKER, and a number of other excellent books, on Friday, he was very reluctant to give an interview. In fact, when he finally said yes, it was on the condition that we come up with questions he hadn't been asked before. Always eager to rise up and face a challenge, I did my best, and Leo came up with a few questions, too. In the end, Mr. Azzarello complimented us, saying that we did, indeed, do a good job. I have no doubt that you will enjoy what follows, the final interview of Wizard World Week.



John Bruni: Otto Penzler recently stated that he was sick and tired of people equating detective fiction with noir. He said that noir is more about losers. Robert Bloch once said something along the same lines, but instead of losers, he said the damned. The losers and the damned, these are your protagonists. What do you think is the appeal?

Brian Azzarello: I wouldn’t go as far as to say these are losers and the damned. They are people who make mistakes, just like every one of us, which is where the appeal lies. When you read this kind of fiction, you recognize when the train goes off the rails, and it’s fascinating to watch. These characters try, usually to no avail, to bring themselves back to the right path. The motivations are so believable. “Losers” is harsh. They’re people who make mistakes. That’s what makes them relatable to me. I guess I just don’t want to call myself a loser.

JB: It does seem that all your characters are doomed from the start because they are predisposed to making those mistakes. And speaking of mistakes, even though crime rates are down these days, there seems to be more of it on TV, on the news. I was in court yesterday, and I saw maybe about five cases. The judge was so bored that he went to his chambers and said to call him if any new cases came in, that he’ll be on break until then. I know, it sounds kind of weird.

BA: It is.

JB: Why do you think there’s more violence on the news? Is it just sensationalism?

BA: Sure, it is.

JB: Do you think it’s the same thing that draws readers to crime fiction?

BA: Maybe. I think it links more to . . . look around today. Look at the crowds at this show. You think these crowds are here for Captain Kirk? They’re here for Governor Jerk.

Leo Perez: I just spoke with him.

BA: Did you?

LP: Yeah.

BA: And what did he say?

LP: He thinks he’s larger than life. I asked him what his plans are for after this, and he said that he wants to rebuild his family. And he’s also going on THE DAILY SHOW on Monday. He really didn’t have much else to say other than, he’s looking for more jobs out there that could make him seem bigger than what he is.

BA: A lot of people in this sort of situation, they take a step back from the spotlight, but he’s running towards it.

LP: He told me that Wizard World approached him.

BA: Well, somebody had to contact somebody. He’s got an agent. I don’t know what to believe there. Nobody’s going to take responsibility.

JB: Have you seen his outrageous rates?

BA: Are they any more outrageous than someone else’s?

JB: They are, actually.

LP: Eighty dollars for a photo op, fifty for an autograph.

BA: How much is Captain Kirk?

Cliff Breaux: Eighty.

JB: Really?

BA: Well, if he can get it . . . .

LP: People are giving it to him.

JB: It seems like people are getting fleeced and liking it, by people like the governor.

BA: I don’t know, do they like it? Do you think so?

JB: They’re willingly giving him money for the photo op.

BA: That doesn’t mean they like him. I think right now they like his infamy. When they announced him, there was a chorus of boos. Does that mean they like him? No, but they want his autograph. Just imagine if OJ was here. Not that I’m equating the two, but I guess I just equated the two.

LP: Will this steer you away from coming again [to Wizard World]?

BA: No, I don’t think so. But it is weird. This has turned into more of an autograph show. It’s really not about comics. I don’t know if it’s for me, anymore. C2E2, that was exclusively about comics.

LP: Is that why DC and Marvel are absent this year?

BA: No, I think that’s something to do with . . . it’s not just DC, it’s something to do with Marvel, Dark Horse, all those big guys. They’re not here, and I don’t know why. I don’t get at all the politics and stuff.

JB: Do you think it’s better to write from pain or love?

BA: You can be more objective if you’re writing from pain.

JB: That’s true. Graves rests at the heart of 100 BULLETS, but what does he really represent? Responsibility? Temptation? Indulgence? A lot of the characters seem to view him in a different light.

BA: That’s what made the character work so well. He wasn’t a chameleon-like character, but he represented something different to all the other characters. He was kind of a tabula rasa for what they wanted to project onto him. It was there. Even though he had his own agenda. He was the manipulator of the entire series. Again, people like getting fleeced.

JB: Even he seems doomed in the end. He’s the most powerful character in the story, and he’s still doomed.

BA: Nobody walked away without blood on their hands. If they walked away.

LP: In your books, I’ve noticed there’s a lot of gang involvement. Not just on the Mafia level, but street gangs. You’re spot on. Was it from personal experience? Or research?

BA: I’ve never been in a gang, but I’ve lived in this city for 20 years. It’s hard not to have personal experience. It’s interesting to see how things change, sometimes for the better, sometimes for worse. Man, you go out to the far west side, Jesus Christ. It’s desolate. Go down to Chicago and Austin, or even further south. Holy shit. It’s not always been that way. Opportunities out here have dried up for a lot of people, and that tends to leave the violence.

LP: How old were you when you moved here?

BA: I don’t know. 25? 26? I grew up in Cleveland, where there’s a lot of gang violence. I mean, not like out here. It was there, but in Cleveland, there weren’t a lot of Latin gangs. Not much back then, when I was there. The Bloods and the Crips had just started going national at that point.

JB: I just have one last question. I know you have FIRST WAVE, and there are a bunch of spin-offs from that, but do you have anything coming up that you’d like to plug?

BA: I’m working on a series right now with Eduardo Risso coming out from Vertigo probably next year or so. It hasn’t been announced, other than that we’re working on something. In the fall, LEX LUTHOR: MAN OF STEEL is being re-released as a hardcover, just like JOKER, with extra scenes we had to cut out originally because they were monthly comics, and we were stuck in the 22-page format. Now we’re ready to throw some stuff back in. It’s a nice companion to JOKER. That’s my plug.

LP: I just have one more quick question. Obviously, you’ve taken a lot of public transportation.

BA: Oh, yeah.

LP: What’s the wackiest character you’ve met, or the weirdest story you have?

BA: Oh, man. Burn Man is still the weirdest guy. I don’t know if you remember him. He was around a lot. Terribly, terribly disfigured. He’d ride the train, and he’d get up in people’s face with a sign with the story of what happened to him, and people would give him money because he was so shocking. He really didn’t have a face. He didn’t have all of his fingers, either. He was just known as Burn Man, and it was a while ago, too. The READER did a story about him. He was really a tragic figure. His burns came from crack. He fell asleep on a mattress while smoking. He was making a substantial amount of money, enough to survive while panhandling. There were doctors who were offering to help him for free, but he refused any help. He was an interesting character, that’s for sure.

JB: Do you think he’ll ever show up in your work someday?

BA: Nah, he was too over the top.

JB: Truth is stranger than fiction.

BA: Some old dude showed me his cock once. That was kind of weird.

LP: One time I was out on the orange line, and you get a lot of crazies there—-

BA: That’s where the old guy showed me his cock.

LP: --It was Christmas time, and this big, white-bearded man—-full on beard—-he stumbles in and he sits down. A little girl’s like, “Mommy! There’s Santa Claus!” He then pisses on himself and all over the train.

BA: Wow.

LP: I love Chicago.

BA: That’s a scarring memory.

WIZARD WORLD INTERVIEWS PART THREE

Welcome to day three of the Wizard World interviews! Today's subject is Brian Pulido, creator of many horror/fantasy icons, such as EVIL ERNIE, LADY DEATH, and PURGATORI. He is currently writing a new LADY DEATH series for Avatar. This is the second interview I've conducted with him, so I had to come up with new and interesting questions. I hope I succeeded. Enjoy!



John Bruni: Aside from being your own boss, what was different between working with Chaos and Avatar?

Brian Pulido: Obviously the day to day work that was associated with publishing, I was no longer accountable to that, so it allowed me to focus a bit more on the creative. It gave me a different perspective that allowed me to just be concerned about that. I think that’s the biggest difference.

JB: Last time, we talked about the possibility that characters like Belladonna, War Angel, Gypsy, and the others might show up in the new LADY DEATH book. Have you and William Christensen talked any further about that?

BP: Actually, we discussed those characters, and we’re in the formative stages of discussing a series, whose name will be decided, that will involve Belladonna, Medieval Lady Death, and their requisite villains. We’re not calling it a crossover, but those two characters are coming back for more action.

JB: Lady Death has survived longer than any of your other characters. They tried bringing back Evil Ernie and Purgatori with another company, but it was short lived. What do you think is Lady Death’s appeal?

BP: Lady Death is iconic. She really is the ultimate expression of the bitch goddess. There’s something about her. She’s equally loved by men and women. Men want to be with her, and women want to be her.

JB: Is there any chance of some background Chaos characters, like Bedlam or Cremator, making an appearance in the new Lady Death book?

BP: It would be fun if some of the older Chaos characters could, but legally, we’re limited to just Lady Death and characters who appear in her title. Characters like Leviatha, for example.

JB: Now that you’ve done THE GRAVES, what was it like to work with Bill Moseley and Tony Todd?

BP: It was fun working with them both. They’re professionals. Really nice. They were fun, and they brought a lot of energy and invention to the story. They were respectful all around. They’re fun. You hear people talk about actors, oh, they were so great, but they really were.

JB: I really liked Bill Moseley in this movie. His character was amazing.

BP: Writing that character came naturally to me. When Bill brought the idea to me about the pig nose, I was able to revise the dialogue and tailor it more towards a man who thinks like a pig.

JB: I remember when you came back to writing EVIL ERNIE, you watched a bunch of horror movies to bone up on the genre. Nowadays, what kind of horror movies do you enjoy?

BP: I watch any horror movie I think will be good. My favorites from the last few years are things like CARRIERS. I liked END OF THE LINE and BEFORE THE FALL. I like indie horror. I see remakes as kind of an obligation. The DAWN OF THE DEAD remake was a stand-out for me. I liked 28 DAYS LATER. So, the last five, ten years, those are some of the movies I was thinking about. I liked a small indie film called THE OTHER SIDE. I seek out obscure stuff. I’ve seen all the French new wave horror. HIGH TENSION. Even a movie like PULSE, I thought the American and the original, there’s just some cool stuff in them. I like slasher films, but it’s hard for them to be exciting. The NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET remake, not so great.

JB: I was about to ask, since you wrote for Freddy, what you thought of the remake.

BP: Yeah, not so great. Very unimaginative given the fact that the guy’s a dream demon. I don’t know why they went that way. I tend to like stuff that’s apocalyptic, like THE END OF THE LINE or BEFORE THE FALL, but I’m always tracking horror films. I have zero interest in stuff like SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE, it’s just not my bag. I like horrific stuff that tends to be apocalyptic, heaven and hell, extreme supernatural stuff.

JB: What are you reading these days?

BP: Comics-wise, I’m reading CAPTAIN AMERICA and THE WALKING DEAD.

JB: Looking forward to the AMC series?

BP: Totally. It’s like a dream come true. You gotta’ love that stuff. Obviously, I like the zombie stuff, I liked it before it was trendy. I loved it when I was a child.

JB: Do you have any film projects coming up?

BP: We do have a ghost story in development. I can’t talk about it yet, but our specific goal is to scare people. Like, in THE GRAVES, there were a lot of different goals. Fun, action, gross. This one, we’re saying SCARE. Scare only.

JB: After the new LADY DEATH, what’s new for you?

BP: There’s a lot to do, and not a lot I can discuss. But what I can tell you is, in the world of film, television, and comics, there is new stuff coming in 2011 and 2012. This year has been a percolating year. There are some things that might surprise you.


Tune in tomorrow, for I have saved the best interview for last: Brian Azzarello! Some of you might remember the last time I interviewed him, and you're probably thinking, "Best? Whatever." Don't be too sure. This one will knock your cock off.

WIZARD WORLD INTERVIEWS PART TWO

Welcome to day two of the Wizard World interviews. Today, I'd like you to meet Douglas Paszkiewicz, writer and illustrator of ARSENIC LULLABY!



John Bruni: Your sense of humor is questionable. How has ARSENIC LULLABY survived for so long?

Douglas Paszkiewicz: Well, there are a lot of questionable people out there. As society crumbles, our margins rise, you see.

JB: Excellent. Has there ever been an ARSENIC LULLABY piece that made even you cringe?

DP: Quite a few. If it weren’t for deadlines, I would have cut out a lot of stuff, but when you need a certain amount of pages by a certain time, you just say, to hell with it, it’s going in. A lot of the Nazi stuff, if I had time to think about it, I’d probably have left it out. But time is a tyrant, so in it goes.

JB: I like Abraham Lincoln’s role in your work.

DP: Thank you. He’s a lot of fun to draw.

JB: Is there any subject that would be taboo for you?

DP: Define taboo.

JB: Something you would absolutely not joke about.

DP: I try to stay away from sex jokes, religion jokes, not really because they make me cringe, but because people who are into that have an axe to grind and they’re not enjoying the timing and the structure of the joke. If I joke about sex, people want to just see nudity, and the jokes are just lost on them. I try to keep swear words out of it because I think it’s funnier when something horrible happens, and there’s a word balloon of x’s and o’s and zigzags.

JB: Can you tell us anything about the cartoon?

DP: Well, it’s strange that you should mention Abraham Lincoln, because he plays a role in the cartoon. What we basically did was, we took three stories directly from the comic book and just put those in animated form. I got some stand-up comedian friends and friends in bands doing the voice-over work for me. It turned out pretty decent, I believe. So, Voodoo Joe is in it, Baron von Donut is in it, and Abraham Lincoln as the devil sort of wraps everything together. It’s every bit as despicable as the comic book.

JB: Have you retired entirely from the comic book world, or will there be more books from you in the future?

DP: If the cartoon should go up in smoke, then I’ll do some more comic books, but I really am having a lot of fun doing the cartoon right now because I’ve got sound, I’ve got motion, so it’s a lot easier to tell a story when you have those two elements. I’m still doing work for MAD Magazine, so you can always go there to get your taste of my sense of humor. But for the time being, I’m going to work on the cartoon. The pilot turned out decently enough to say hey, we can do this. I’ll keep doing that until I get sick of it and say to hell with it with my brush and ink and bristle board.

JB: Aside from the cartoon and MAD, what’s next for you?

DP: Well, there’s enough on my plate right now, to be honest with you. I really bit off more than I can chew with the cartoon, but fortunately I got a lot of help, so it turned out good. But it’s going to keep me busy for a little while, I think.

Leo Perez: Is the cartoon only available on DVD right now, or is it going to come out on TV soon?

DP: We took it to several different networks. Basically, this is a pitch pilot. While they’re mulling over that, we’ll put it up on iTunes on a pay-per-download basis. As we accumulate more [content], we’ll send out more DVD’s for people to pick up, and that sort of thing. Distribution-wise, we’re going the same route we went with the comic books. Everybody who is a fan of the comic book will be able to get the DVD, and once it gets picked up by somebody, I’ll be able to retire to Cuba, or something.


Tune in tomorrow for my interview with EVIL ERNIE and LADY DEATH creator, Brian Pulido!

WIZARD WORLD INTERVIEWS PART ONE

Welcome to Wizard World Interview Week! Yes, I've finally transcribed everything for your reading pleasure! I was going to release one interview a day, but then I realized that this is a short week. In light of this, I have decided to kick off with TWO, count 'em, TWO interviews! Enjoy, and be sure to support the small press! Buy their work!

First off, here is my interview with Jon Michael Lennon, writer and illustrator of PRODUCT OF SOCIETY . . . .



John Bruni: How long have you been in the business?

Jon Michael Lennon: Zero years. I am not in any business. No, I’ve been making my own comic books for four years.

JB: What inspired you to publish your own comics?

JML: I always wanted to, and I publish my own because it’s hard, as anyone can tell you, to break into the actual business even with small publishing houses. You always submit stuff, and you get nothing back. After time, a lot of people are like, “Oh, they don’t want me, so I’ll just keep trying, or I’ll give up.” Well, I got a Visa with a high limit. Sure, the debt keeps getting higher, but I’ll pay off a little bit every year. The goal is to someday, maybe not have to pay a printer. Until then . . . you know.

JB: You’ve been around Artists Alley a while now. How has it treated you?

JML: It all depends on the person. I sold a couple of books today, which is better than zero. It’s tough because not everyone is my target audience. You guys are probably more my target audience because you’re younger, you have a sense of humor. A lot of people walking around are old, they got Wolverine shirts, they have no interest in dolphins having sex with chicks. The way it’s treated me? It’s all a matter of positivity. I’m not the most financially successful at this, but I try, and that’s all that matters. I’m lucky to be in the position to be able to do that.

JB: Is it hard marketing your stuff, considering the mature content?

JML: Maybe it kind of screens my audience a tad. At the same time, I don’t have the ability to do anything wholesome. I’ve tried. If the word “fuck” isn’t in my work, I don’t like it. It’s just what I do. Think of Adult Swim. I know they’re not saying fuck, but that kind of humor, there’s an audience for that kind of stuff. Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Vertigo, I mean, they’re a bit more high class than me, but that kind of stuff? That’s my audience. It’s a very small audience, and I’m one guy, so it’s tough. But I keep going and going, and hopefully someday, something will happen. I’m doing this, no matter what, so I might as well make a few bucks off of it.

JB: Speaking of a weird audience, has it been cool to you, or does it get too weird?

JML: Too weird? Not so far, yet. It’s only Friday morning. Most people have been nice to me. They’ve either bought my comics and have been nice, or they’ve looked at me with disdain and spat on the table. Well, not that last part, but there is a chain of comic book stores in Chicago called Graham Crackers, and I know the manager of the store I go to, so I got him to carry the first book I did. And then, some kid bought it and the mother came back, quite irate. There was some guy shooting up semen into his vein to get high off it, or whatever the hell I was writing about. They had to pull it off the shelves. I don’t see the problem. They’re weak, man. Gotta’ be strong.

JB: Considering things like the anti-smoking killer, the stoner-thief having a demon come out of his asshole—-

JML: It’s funny, man. You’ve got notes and everything.

JB: Dare I say that there might be some moral content to your work? In spite of having, you know, government agents drinking poop from a glass?

JML: Wait, what’s the question? Well, of course. It’s all about accepting the Lord Jesus—-no, I’m just trying to make people laugh. If I had to say what my comics are really about, well, it’s gay-sounding, but I’m just trying to say life is funny, and we should all laugh at the worst possible things we can think of. We’re all going to die, so chill out. I don’t think there’s much more of a moral than that. I don’t have anyone getting raped, so I’m against rape.

JB: That’s good.

JML: Especially man-on-man. I don’t know, I’m no creature, man. I just want to make people laugh and spread my disease to the world with whatever comes out of my brain. This book here has the return of the Cyborg Dolphin, but the story I did in the back is really fucking dark. There’s a baby in the womb giving the middle finger, necro-bestiality, man-on-man rape. Well, you don’t see the rape, but it’s implied. This guy, he finds the Lord, and he reads the Bible and the Qua'ran 2-in-1, and he gets out of prison and celebrates by getting a prostitute who bites his dick off. So, those are lessons. Like, check out your prostitute first. Thoroughly.

JB: That said, would you consider any subject taboo?

JML: Jeez, man. I’m not a bad guy. I’m not a freak. I don’t think child molestation is funny. But besides that, what else can you say? For instance, I had a buddy who was doing the cover for PRODUCT OF SOCIETY #3, and it didn’t work out because he drew a woman in a straight jacket, just like we’d talked about. But when he gave it to me, besides being a bad painting, you could see her pussy, dude. I can’t have a pussy on the cover of my comic book. Are you fucking crazy? They’re going to kick me out of here. The only taboo is stuff that’s not funny. I got a lot about terrorists and stuff. Hell, I don’t know. If I could find a way to make child molestation funny, I’d probably write about it.

JB: What’s next for you?

JML: I’m still working on PRODUCT OF SOCIETY, but I’m kind of stressed out with it. The Cyborg Dolphin story has to be continued. After I finish this up, I’m going to start work on some paintings because I feel like I’m kind of stagnating with my cartoony style. I have the ability to do better art, so I want to take a break and do some interesting pieces like this series of paintings I’ve been thinking about. It’s still going to be dark and fucked up, but it’ll just be better art. I have some interest in doing computer animation, just to make some cartoons and put them up on YouTube. Otherwise, I’ll continue to do this kind of thing, society will live on, and that’s about it.


Interview the Second: Kurt Dinse, writer and illustrator of ONE YEAR IN INDIANA . . . .



John Bruni: How long have you been in the business?

Kurt Dinse: I’ve never really been in the business, but I’ve been making comics for about five years, maybe six.

JB: I’ve seen you a lot in Artists Alley. How has Artists Alley treated you over the years?

KD: Pretty good. It’s kind of a different vibe from the rest of the convention because people who usually come through here are here for a specific reason. They’re not here to buy a toy. They’re looking for something they’ve never seen before. Maybe some guys come through here asking you for a picture of Wolverine or something but most say, “Hey, here’s something I’ve never seen before.” So generally, it’s treated me pretty good.

JB: I’ve seen you at C2E2 as well. What do you think the difference is between the shows?

KD: You know, it’s kind of funny. I’ve been talking about that with everyone who comes through here. I found out that people are either bitching about this show, or they're bitching about C2E2. They want this show to be more like C2E2. The only thing I didn’t really like about C2E2 was that, I live around here, and it still is a pain in the ass to get to [McCormick Place]. But the thing about it was, there were windows. There was sunlight, and I could see the city, so it’s kind of a double-edged sword. I wish both companies would treat the artists a little better as far as having ridiculous table prices. I mean, I know they have to cover the prices and costs and stuff, but you’re not really helping anybody by thinning out their art pool. So, I kind of like them both for different reasons. This is a really big artists area as compared to C2E2, but C2E2 had a lot of really good artists over there. Sorry, I’m about as waffley as you can get.

JB: So, how much of ONE YEAR IN INDIANA is based on fact?

KD: More than you’d think. A lot of them are based on fact. Really, quite a bit of them.

JB: Even the one about the jam bands?

KD: Yes.

JB: What is your favorite metal? I see you’re wearing a Motorhead shirt.

KD: I grew up with a lot of the old school stuff. That’s what the character always wears. The shirts of all those good bands. That was the stuff I listened to back then. For a while, I listened to punk, then I came back to metal. Stoner kind of metal, or whatever they call it. I like the super heavy aggressive stuff. I like Mastodon a lot. I guess they’re kind of proggy, but it’s good, it’s different. I have a certain love for super noisy crap, like Relapse and stuff like that.

Cliff Breaux: Dillinger Escape Plan?

KD: Yeah, stuff like that. Have you ever heard them do Soundgarden’s “Spoonman?”

CB: No, I haven’t.

KD: It sounds exactly like the record. They didn’t change it much at all, and you’d think that band would freak that song out. I have an interest, not musically, in a lot of black metal. It fascinates me. It’s a fascinating culture. The music’s okay. It’s not that it’s not too fast, it’s just not heavy enough.

JB: As far as your art goes, what would you say are your biggest influences?

KD: There’s a ton. I started getting into a lot of guys from the Seventies in the past couple of years, like CREEPY and HEAVY METAL MAGAZINE. Corbin’s a big one. Started getting into Moebius a lot. That’s because their styles are so different. I grew up on John Byrne and all those cats. Really, all the different guys were all doing this weird Seventies stuff, the super-thick lines and all sorts of good stuff. That kind of era really influenced me.

JB: What’s next for you?

KD: I have a new book out, my first spin off of ONE YEAR IN INDIANA called TALES FROM THE FRATHOUSE. There are three, four little stories not based on fact at all. Well, maybe a smidgen. They’re just about frathouses, and I’ve always thought that they’re ripe for parody. But I hope to collect everything I’ve done in a nice, shiny, glossy book. I’ve got two more—-well, I have a lot more stories—-but I have two more to do, and then I’ll self-publish everything in a book with a color cover, something nice and thick. Then, I can just keep going on. Eventually, I’m going to run out of stories. I just have to figure out when. I probably have another year or two of this. And I’m doing this science fiction book called HURR, based on a friend’s story. He ripped it off from HEAVY METAL, and all that kind of stuff. It’s a rip-off, it totally is. And I’ve got some other stories that are brewing in my head, about an old folks home and maybe a version of THE RE-ANIMATOR, which would be true to the actual story, which I find a really humorous story, if you look at it the right way.


Tune in tomorrow for my interview with the creator of ARSENIC LULLABY, Douglas Paszkiewicz!

BACHELOR'S GROVE: THE MOST HAUNTED CEMETERY IN THE CHICAGOLAND AREA: a graveyard review

Once upon a time, the Midlothian turnpike continued a few yards down into a wooded area that eventually dead-ended at a tiny cemetery that is mostly hidden from view today, but too many teenagers parked their cars down here for make-out sessions. Too many Wiccans parked down here for midnight ceremonies. Too many Satanists parked down here for animal sacrifices. And then, there was just the group of kids who liked to park down here, get drunk, and deface graves.

Now, if you want to head down to Bachelors Grove, you have to park at the forest preserve across the street, then cross a fairly busy road, and then take the short path that was once a part of the turnpike through the woods to the chain-link fence that marks the cemetery. On the way down, you’ll notice one thick branch hanging over the path. Do you remember, from when you were a kid, the story about the boyfriend being hung upside down over his car so his girlfriend could hear his fingernails scraping the roof? This is where the urban legend started.

At the end of the path is where another urban legend found its beginning. Do you remember the story about the mental patient with the hook for a hand? Once again, this is the place where the story started. This is not to say that either story is true, of course, but this is where these stories were first told.



When you first set foot into this boneyard, you will first notice that everything is overgrown. There are no caretakers, and no one has been buried here for quite some time. Dead trees are everywhere, and some have even fallen over cracked tombstones. In fact, more than a few graves have been knocked over, concealing the names of those who have been buried here presumably forever. It doesn’t look like anyone has an interest in taking care of this place.



Need more evidence? Turn left and go to the double grave near the back of the fence. Notice anything? Someone has been digging in this grave, and no one has bothered to fill it in. In fact, the grass is already beginning to grow over the missing divot.



Take a look around at some of the stumps, and you’ll see melted wax from candles. These are from the regular Wiccan visitors. If you find the bones of small animals, they’re from the Satanists.

Through the fence at the very back, straight ahead from the opening gate, there is a hole through which you can step through and look across the tiny loch at the highway beyond. The surface is usually scummed over, so it is hard to tell exactly how deep it is. The mob knows, though; this was a popular body dump for them back in the day, or so the legend goes. It is also here that the two-headed ghost wanders, along with a ghostly farmer/horse team. No one can explain the former, but the latter apparently was dragged to his drowning death when his horse spooked and pulled him into the loch.



These are not the only haunts to hang around Bachelors Grove. There is the usual lady in white, a ghostly house, and back when you could still drive down here, some people reported crashing into a ghost car.

Are these stories true? Who knows? One might even point out that it doesn’t matter. This is one of the spookiest graveyards the Chicagoland area has to offer. Just be sure to not get caught here at night. No, not because of ghosts, but because of the police. They patrol the cemetery on a regular basis to keep vandalism down, and you don’t want to be caught by them after hours.

But if you want to come down sometime in the day, bring a camera. Most people wind up capturing mysterious images on film.



Bachelors Grove Cemetery
143rd St. and the Midlothian Turnpike
Midlothian, IL 60445

C2E2: BETTER LATE THAN NEVER

[NOTE: Whenever you see the words "sidebar interview," you can actually read the interviews here: http://thenapalmassault.blogspot.com/2010/04/john-bruni-interviews-at-c2e2.html]



If you read comic books by the issue, you have undoubtedly seen the advertisements everywhere: “C2E2: THE CON CHICAGO NEEDS. THE CON YOU DESERVE!” From April 16-18, C2E2, or the Chicago Comics and Entertainment Expo, celebrated its maiden year in the Lakeside building of the McCormick place to the tune of 28,000 attendees, according to the C2E2 blog. Exact numbers aren’t out yet, but taking into consideration the price of admission ($30 for one day, $60 for all three), this means the show made anywhere between $84,000 and $1.68 million.

Upon entering the convention floor, one is inundated with fellow attendees dressed up as their favorite characters, not just from comic books, but also from popular movies and television shows. Superman stands in the corner talking with Link from LEGEND OF ZELDA while Princess Leia shares a soft pretzel with her son, who is dressed as Spiderman. Meanwhile, over by the DeLorean from BACK TO THE FUTURE and the Batmobile from the Adam West BATMAN TV show, the Joker and Harley Quinn are inviting any passers-by to stop in and get their pictures taken with such Hollywood icons . . . for $10, of course. It is, after all, a convention.



Shills leap out from every booth, eager to sell their products, whether they be bootlegged DVD’s, their latest CD, a web comic, or even memorabilia, like old movie posters and autographed photographs of Hollywood stars. There are contests everywhere, and when one walks through Artists Alley, they are confronted with hopeful faces and an array of brand new, independent possibilities.

In short, it’s just like Wizard World Chicago. In fact, some skeptics have questioned as to whether or not C2E2 is necessary, since WWC, while actually located in suburban Rosemont, has ruled this roost for 20 years. However, attendees of C2E2 saw a few differences. For one, there is a lot of space to move around, whereas WWC is practically impossible to navigate through. There are the same smells of body odor and flatulence, but it’s not so bad when the person emitting these fumes isn’t rubbing up against you. And whereas WWC is closed off from the outside world like the inside of a casino, C2E2 has windows, and the crowd is actually exposed to sunlight. Granted, near the end of the day, it becomes blindingly bright, but at the same time, it is nice to be reminded that the outside world still exists. The panel rooms at McCormick Place are nicer, too.

But there is one key difference between the two conventions: WWC has, in recent years, been overtaken by pop culture in general, whereas C2E2’s clear loyalty is to comics. There is overlap, of course, but WWC’s guests last year were composed almost exclusively of wrestlers, television and movie stars, and something called a “reality TV star,” which probably doesn’t really exist. Comics writers and artists took a back seat.

So C2E2 had to up the ante by inviting practically everyone in the comics industry, from the folks usually found in Artists Alley to web comics creators to hot new talent to seasoned professionals to writers of actual books to the people who run everything. Jim Lee has been a regular, but Karen Berger and Joe Quesada? What about Peter Straub and George R.R. Martin? Does the name Neil Gaiman ring a bell? And how long has it been since Garth Ennis came to Chicago?



At a glance, the DC booth looks as it always has. The corners have been relegated to their separate properties, Wildstorm and Vertigo, with another corner dedicated to the toys they produce. Free comics are stacked up all over the place (more on that later). But who is that sitting at the Vertigo table? It’s none other than FABLES writer Bill Willingham! [Sidebar interview.]

Later in the day, crime writer Brian Azzarello has taken Willingham’s place. [Sidebar interview.]

Not all companies have had it as easy as DC, but there are some who keep kicking against the pricks and do so rather well, with a stable of amazing talent, no less. Take Avatar, for example. They started publishing in 1996 and were mostly known for their “bad girl” characters, like Pandora and Hellina. However, Avatar grew up quickly when it started publishing creator owned books with no content restrictions. Garth Ennis, Warren Ellis, Alan Moore, and other greats answered the call, and Avatar has been producing some of the most interesting, mind-blowing books on the market. In fact, some of their writers and artists are so dedicated to their company and their craft that they have decided to sign at the booth for the entire time C2E2 is open.

Take Jacen Burrows and Mike Wolfer, for example. [Sidebar interviews.]

And then there is comics legend, Brian Pulido. [Sidebar interview.]

Even LAW AND ORDER: SVU and NUMB3RS writer Christos Gage can be seen hanging out at the Avatar booth, signing books and pimping his most recent releases, including the first ABSOLUTION miniseries and the graphic novel from Vertigo Crime, AREA 10. [Review of AREA 10 will be posted soon.]

On Saturday, Garth Ennis sits at the Avatar booth, ready to sign. If you spend $30 or more at the booth, you get VIP status for this signing. This means that you get to go first, before the non-VIP signing, and you can have more things signed. Three items from other publishers, and anything else Avatar has published. As Ennis signs, he’s willing to talk about anything at all, from the final PREACHER story that will probably never be published (as reported elsewhere, it is the story of the Sexual Investigators; if you want to read it, it is recommended that you let Vertigo know, or in the words of Ennis himself, “Give them shit about it.”) to the reason why it’s been five years since a new issue of DICKS has been released (because they’re not big money makers; SHAME ON YOU, AMERICA!) to the search for good American beer (which has been a bit more successful than some would think).

No matter how much these talented individuals have to do at this show, it pales in comparison to William Christensen, the head of Avatar. He moves around the booth with sweat gleaming on his forehead, making sure that everything is running smoothly, that product is always on display, that product is moving, and trying to organize the big signings, namely Garth Ennis, George R.R. Martin, and Max Brooks. Of all the folks at the Avatar booth, he is the only one who turns down an interview, and one can hardly blame him. It is clear that C2E2 has wiped him out, that he is probably looking forward to sleeping for a week after the convention, and yet he somehow manages to stay on his feet. Through the virtue of Avatar’s amazing books, the publishing company has managed to get a lot of attention. One look at Christensen shows that a lot of hard work has gone into this, and the battle has been uphill the whole way.



In fact, it looks like the only ones who have had it easy (or at least easier than most) are DC and Marvel, and maybe Image. The convention is saturated with publishing companies desperate for your attention. For example, during the last half-hour of the first day, Archaia declares that anything on the center table of their booth is for free. The booth is inundated with customers, most of whom have come in to get their free books and not to look at the rest of their selection, which is a shame, considering the quality of these free books. Not one of them is much good. ARTESIA BESIEGED and ROBOTIKA are incredibly awful, and STARKWEATHER IMMORTAL barely qualifies as mediocre. SOME NEW KIND OF SLAUGHTER tries to educate, but it’s bogged down in a stiff style and awkward sideways printing. Only THE KILLER seems decent, but it’s hard to tell for sure because they only gave away issues four, nine, and ten. This makes judging the story impossible, as it is a book that needs to be read in order.

However, those who just came by to get their free books and not browse probably missed a book simply called TUMOR. [TUMOR review will be posted soon.]

All in all, Archaia could have taken a lesson from DC’s booth. In the Vertigo section, they are giving away the first issues of DAYTRIPPER, JOE THE BARBARIAN, and DEMO, which makes getting into a sequential book much easier. Sadly, these three titles do not amount to much, and neither do THE AUTHORITY and WILDCATS books they are giving away in the Wildstorm corner. SPARTA #1 is a bit more promising, but the true star of the free books DC are giving away is VICTORIAN UNDEAD. [VICTORIAN UNDEAD review will be posted soon.]

If comic books aren’t your thing, there are plenty of other products on the floor to choose from. Do you want autographed photos of celebrities? They’re here. Toys? They’re everywhere. Pithy t-shirts? A stone’s throw away. Old pulp magazines? You got it. Hell, do you want a tattoo? You can find several artists ready and eager to go to work on you. For those with the money, there is an IRON MAN auction going on, in which you can buy props used in the actual movie.



Then there are the DVD’s. If you want a bootleg, they’re all over the place, but the true attraction for movie lovers are the imports. You can find practically any movie you want in the world, including one of the worst films ever made, Ed Wood’s NECROMANIA. [See NECROMANIA review previously posted.]

Every once in a while, you might come upon a booth selling something a little more interesting, like Retro-a-Go-Go. They have t-shirts with old pulp fiction covers depicted on the front. They only fit the ladies, but some of you guys will probably like them enough to buy at least one, just to have it. They also sell flasks, lighters, key-rings, and picture frames with retro art on them. Is it no surprise that they have an undying love for all things Bettie Page? For those of you who can’t wait until the next C2E2, you can check them out at www.retro-a-go-go.com.

Walking around this convention, seeing all that it has to offer, can take a lot out of a person, especially if that person is lugging around a lot of books to be signed and recently purchased products. You can either spend a fortune on a Pepsi and pizza (or churros, or nachos, or whatever), or you can stop by one of the many booths offering free samples of energy drinks. Rockstar, Venom, Amp, they’re all here, and they’re here to help you stay on your feet.



And for those who want to know the state of their favorite publishing companies (or for those who want to take a load off), there are the panels. The very first of the show was the Vertigo panel with Karen Berger, Peter Straub, Scott Snyder, Cliff Chiang, Bill Willingham, and others. Here are a few things they discussed:

--THE UNWRITTEN. This awful book, sadly, shows no sign of being cancelled. Somehow, it collected three Eisner nominations, and one of the panelists said, “It’s kind of like if Garth Ennis wrote WINNIE THE POOH.” This is a selling point, but as anyone who has read the book can tell you, it’s a bit of a stretch.

--THE GREEN WOMAN. This is why Peter Straub is here today. There was a character from his novel, THE THROAT, by the name of Frank Belknap (fans of the Lovecraft circle will recognize this name). He was a very nasty serial killer who was quickly killed off with very little explanation as to his character. Vertigo has convinced Straub to create an alternate universe version of Belknap and put him in a home for spectacular serial killers. “It’s horror at its meanest and most powerful,” Berger said.



--AMERICAN VAMPIRE. This is number one reason for most people to attend this panel; since Stephen King is the co-writer, this is not surprising. Scott Snyder is tired of the Anne Rice-type vampire. He says the romantic vampire is simply not scary, that vampires are supposed to be your loved ones and neighbors come back from the grave to kill you. He cites ‘SALEM’S LOT as a major influence. Since he is friends with King, the master was invited by Vertigo to be a part of this book. [AV review will be posted soon.]

--Good news for JACK OF FABLES fans: #50 has been referred to as a “game changer.” Readers know that the book has recently focused on Jack Frost, the good son of Jack Horner (the title character). While it is interesting to see his adventures, they just don’t compare to his father’s. Why? Perhaps it’s because Jack Horner is a scoundrel and it’s a lot more fun to watch him in action. They did not go into details as to what might change this game, but keep an eye out for #50.

--Were you a fan of SHADE THE CHANGING MAN? Hell, do you remember the title? Not many do, but it was one of the first books on Vertigo’s roster back in their beginning days. If you enjoyed the series, then you’re in for good news: he’s coming back. After a short reintroduction in HELLBLAZER (which is only fair, considering the time that John Constantine guest-starred in Shade’s book), he will be returning with his own series.

--They also talked about a lot of brand new projects, including Christos Gage’s AREA 10. They discussed REVOLVER, a graphic novel in which the main character goes to work, expecting the usual boring day only to be confronted by the end of the world. He slogs through the destruction and makes it to the end of the day, but the following morning, everything is back to normal. The story switches off between days, and there is even a third story in a scroll at the bottom of each page. From the writer of HELLBLAZER: PAPA MIDNITE and INCOGNEGRO, we have DARK RAIN, a graphic novel using Hurricane Katrina as a backdrop. Two convicts decide to take advantage of the hurricane to rob a bank in New Orleans. In THE EXECUTOR, a man comes back to his hometown to be the executor of the will of a girl he doesn’t know. Denise Mina has SICKNESS IN THE FAMILY for us, the tale of a twisted family that gets killed off one by one. GREENDALE is a graphic novel written by Joshua Dysart and illustrated by Cliff Chiang, based on the Neil Young album. Women in a small town are changing and disappearing when they reach a certain age. The protagonist is a female who is approaching this age, but she’s disappointed in the state of our world. This is the story of what she does as a result. Lastly, we have two books, CUBA MY REVOLUTION and HOW TO UNDERSTAND ISRAEL IN 60 DAYS OR LESS, the first of which is about a woman who had to grow up in Cuba during Castro’s regime, and the latter about one American woman’s visit to Israel to see firsthand the horrors and the disadvantages of both the Israelis and the Palestinians.

--During the Q&A session, Straub was asked about the future of his own work with comics. Specifically, Stephen King has had a lot of luck with his work being translated into comic books lately. In fact, King and Straub’s THE TALISMAN is being published by Del Ray now, and the questioner was wondering if any of Straub’s older work, perhaps SHADOWLANDS or FLOATING DRAGON, would be published in a comics format. Straub said that at the time, there were no plans. As far as Del Ray goes, they just send him and King images for them to approve.



The Marvel panel is a lot more crowded, but not as interesting. Joe Quesada is a dynamic speaker who isn’t afraid to tell the truth. For example, he admits to enjoying DC Comics more than Marvel at one point in his life, even though he’s the big man at Marvel now. The problem is, Marvel’s ideas aren’t that exciting. He describes a new CAPTAIN AMERICA project helmed by Ed Brubaker, one of the greatest writers working in the industry, but there’s nothing about it that seems to leap off the page. Not even Warren Ellis’ new IRON MAN motion comic is exciting (but motion comics really aren’t that great, anyway, so that battle was lost from its conception).

Back to the convention floor. The one thing that C2E2 has that WWC does not is an area dedicated to web comics. One gentleman is handing out bookmarks with his website on them, www.1977thecomic.com. The tagline: “Life, one toke at a time . . . .” Upon going online, though, this is a bit of an exaggeration. It’s the story of a young man in Lombard, IL, who decides that he’s going to be a rock star. He answers an ad in the paper and rents a room in a stranger’s house. Wacky PERFECT STRANGERS/ODD COUPLE hijinks ensue, sometimes involving weed, but more often than not involving mystic toads, magical sex changes, failed rock gigs, and the like. It’s not super funny. The jokes are usually kind of lame, but if you’re bored, it will get you through the day.

Speaking of hijinks ensuing, C2E2 was graced with the appearance of web comic HIJINKS ENSUE, where they are pimping their first collection, GODSPEED, YOU FANCY BASTARD. Do you like jokes about how the Ewoks used the Care Bear Countdown to blow up the Death Star? How about any joke about Iron Man, video games, THE MATRIX, and . . . and just about every pop culture reference you can think of? If the answer is yes, head over to www.hijinksensue.com at your earliest possible convenience. Only then will you find out about JURASSIC PARK 4: FREAKIN’ DINOSAURS WITH FREAKIN’ LASER BEAMS. And did you know that Darth Vader and Stephen Colbert made it to the birth of Christ via the Tron car? You will . . . .



And now for a stroll down Artists Alley. This is the corner of the convention that most people don’t visit, mostly because they’re not interested in finding something completely new. They have come to C2E2 to meet some of their favorite creators, a few celebrities, and to look for some of the more hard-to-find products they’ve been thinking about for a while. No, the browsers you find down on AA are the hardcore comics readers. They’re the ones looking for the up-and-comers. They’re ready to think outside of the major comics companies. They’re the ones who want more from a convention.

Going up and down the aisles of AA, the usual faces are seen. You know the ones. They have a table at every WWC. There are a few illustrators from DC and Marvel down here, looking to sell original art pages, but for the most part, the creators you meet down here are trying to get their indie books off the ground. Sadly, there isn’t much of a selection down here this time around. The familiar faces are too familiar, and nothing really jumps out at you and demands your attention.

Wait. There is a sign over one table with a picture of a large bearded man in wrestling gear shouting, “PLATO SMASH!” The book? ACTION PHILOSOPHERS! [ACTION PHILOSOPHERS review will be posted soon.]

Sadly, the only other attention-grabber is ONE YEAR IN INDIANA. The symbol for Kurt Dinse’s book is the black outline of the state of Indiana with a giant pentagram in the middle of it. They are pimping a new issue in addition to Dinse’s latest project, HURR. [ONE YEAR IN INDIANA and HURR reviews will be posted soon.]

All things considered, was C2E2 the convention Chicago deserved? According to rumor, the event coordinators were disappointed with the number of attendees. They wanted 30,000 at the least. Not only that, but McCormick Place is kind of a pain in the ass to get to, and the cost of parking is absurd. When the chips are down, and all the cards have been turned over, C2E2 is pretty much the same as WWC. Will Chicago convention goers want two conventions a year? Will they have the money for them? Time will tell for sure. Chances are, one of these two conventions will die out in the next few years, but which one will it be?

One thing is for sure: C2E2 is already planning to be here next year. Will you be there?