Tuesday, July 26, 2016

GOODNIGHT, FUCKERS #181: FULL CIRCLE

Today was the first day of my new job. I thought back to the beginning of my previous job from 10 years ago. I remember seeing what I was going to do and feeling completely overwhelmed. I felt like a fraud just sitting there, nodding and pretending that I understood what I saw. But I learned fast, and I got promotion after promotion until before I knew it, the guy who barely knew how to copy and paste was suddenly in a tech support position.


During those ten years I trained a lot of people. I always saw the same look on their faces. They were terrified because they were nodding and pretending to understand what they saw. I did something that none of my trainers did for me: I told them I know it's overwhelming, but that the more they stuck around, the more they would truly understand what I was showing them. Before they know it, they'll be doing this like it's second nature.


I won a lot of people over with that. Some of them even went on to become great at their jobs. I lost a few. They couldn't take it. Usually they quit the same day they saw all the stuff that would be expected of them. It's scary shit, but I know that it can be conquered. I did it myself, and I helped others do it, too.


Today I went into my new job for the first time. I had a lot of information shoved into my brain, information that I probably won't retain at first. But I've been here before. I have faith in myself that I can learn to do this, and it will be second nature to me.


And then my new boss and my trainer both did something independent of each other: they checked with me to see if they were scaring me off. They told me that the more I stuck around the more I would truly understand what they were showing me. Before I know it, I'll be doing this like it's second nature.


I'm not one to believe in a sentient universe, but if I did I would say that it has a very delicious sense of humor. It makes me laugh every time.

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