After last night's GF I'm sure you can figure out that I'm not doing all that great. I'm still leaking bloody pus from my ass, so I'd rather not be sitting at my laptop and typing. I was already at work for eight hours, where I sat down all day. My ripped up jeans aren't looking so hot, but I decided to wear my trench coat whenever I had to stand up. Only the sups know about about the seat of my pants.
So needless to say, this will be a short one.
Every once in a while I hear someone admonish someone else for using the word "ain't." They say things like, "Ain't isn't a word." I need that to stop now. Yes, this is coming from the guy who fought tooth and nail to hold onto the Oxford comma. I lost that one and others, and the score is very obvious to me now. Evolve or be left behind.
The next time someone tells you ain't isn't a word, tell 'em I said fuck you. No, wait, don't do that. Sorry, I'm feeling very . . . raw. Raw is the perfect word for my current state. No, instead tell them to look at a dictionary. They'll find ain't under the A's. So yeah, that makes it a word.
Languages are supposed to evolve over time. Take a look at the earliest form of our language, Old English. It has very little in common with modern usage of English. Ours is a Germanic language, and Old English sounds kind of like German.
Ain't might not be grammatical, as it's a contraction of "is not." One would be hard pressed to find out what "ai" means. But you should still use "ain't."
If I were to say to you the word "enormity," what would you say that means? Hint: it doesn't mean "enormous." Give up? It indicates a bad act or an immoral act, one that's really, really bad. Like, say, flying a couple of planes into the World Trade Center. But so many people got the definition wrong that the language said, fuck it. Enormity means big now.
This one still irritates me, but language evolution is also why when people use the word "literally" they could be referring to something figurative instead. People literally kept saying "literally" for dramatic effect rather than its actual meaning. Watching a baseball player running fast to home plate, an announcer might say, "Look at him go! He's literally on fire!" But there is an unfortunate lack of flames on the player's body. I still hold a grudge on this one, but fine.
Heh. Fine usually means OK, but considering how many people use it who are suffering in silence? I'll bet fine will mean something else in the near future.
Language evolves. Evolve with it.
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