There is a horrible plot against me. I don't know who or what started this, but it's been plaguing me for years, and I know it will continue for the rest of my life. There is no way to stop it. There is no way to even fight back. I'm doomed, and I know it is all because of this nefarious plot.
Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays, it strikes the hardest. I wake up two minutes before my first alarm goes off, but I don't check the time. I don't have to. I already know the Sword of Damocles is hanging and ready to run me through.
The alarm goes off, and I hit snooze. I grumble to myself because I'm tired as fuck. I can't get out of bed yet, and I tell myself that I'm not going to fall back asleep because then the pain would be worse. I tell myself I'm going to stare at the ceiling until the second alarm goes off. But then I close my eyes. And I start to dream five minutes before the second alarm goes off and ruins the rest of my day. Because I will never be fully awake, and I'll feel miserable at least until I get out of work, and I'll probably not feel much better even then. And then I go to bed so it will all start over again.
Thursdays and Sundays I don't set an alarm because I plan to sleep in. Not that it matters. I wake up at about the time my alarm would have gone off. You'd think that the same thing would happen as on the other days but without the misery. Yeah, I'll close my eyes and go back to sleep and wake up whenever. That sounds glorious.
But that's not what happens. I could tape my eyes shut, and I'd never go back to sleep. Because now I'm awake, and there is nothing I can do about it.
When? When, O Lord, will I get my own Stargate so I can murder the gods that did this to me?
No comments:
Post a Comment