GOODNIGHT, FUCKERS #509: INTIMACY COORDINATORS

There's a "one does not simply" joke here, but I'm not telling it.

 

Sean Bean made news recently when he talked about his displeasure with intimacy coordinators. For those who don't know what that is, they're people on set for filming sex scenes in movies. They're there to make sure some actor doesn't try anything like, say, copping an unwanted feel, for example. His complaint is that it removes spontaneity from the moment. I wonder if he thinks that way about the rest of acting. Like, does he purposely flub lines for the spontaneity? Does he not hit his marks because he wants to feel in the moment? Or maybe he demands his stuntman play it fast and loose rather than safe?

I guess Skeletor is going to break his post-credits promise.

Frank Langella felt the very same way. He believes intimacy coordinators ruin the mood. Considering how he got fired for not playing by the rules, it's kind of a marvel that Sean Bean still got work.

I'm not an actor, but I like to know a little bit about everything, and I know this much: acting is a craft. Not just parts of it, but all of it. Hit your marks, say your dialogue and make sure to follow the rules of the intimacy coordinators. Because, well, Marilyn Manson didn't, and now he's been accused, rightfully so I think, of rape. And, well, also there are guys like this:

Please kill Mr. Kinski.

Yeah, Klaus Kinski was a creepy dude, but it went a long way past what he looked like. If memory serves, his daughter said that he used to sexually abuse her, but more to tonight's point, he liked to unexpectedly insert his fingers into actresses during sex scenes. Not cool, Mr. Kinski. Not cool.

So yeah, Sean Bean should reevaluate his motivation for his opinion. Does he want to be an actor? Or does he just want to make out with women on the job? The former is respectable, but the latter is kinda gross.

If you're wondering about why I said, "Please kill Mr. Kinski," you should watch this.

Also, I find it interesting that Langella, who I'd first seen as Dracula, turned out to be kind of a dick. Who didn't turn out to be a dick? His Van Helsing, Christopher Plummer.

Fuck Nazis.