To be read to this song.
Unlike in previous years I actually *did* start working out again on Sunday. For the first time in maybe 8-9, I think? It was hard remember the workout that I used to do every other day for two decades, but I managed to get the important shit down. I had to cut some leg stuff because of my bad foot. However, I tried to keep the lunges. They don't seem to impact my bad foot, although my good foot is pretty awkward because of the two missing toes.
Much to my delight I found that I was a lot more flexible than I'd expected. I can reach past my toes to my wrist. Unfortunately I can't get my feet behind my head like I used to. Maybe that will change with more workouts. But by the end of my Butt Montana, Esquire, I realized that I felt really fucking good. I felt proud of myself, which doesn't happen often. I knew the next day would suck, but in that moment I didn't care.
Yeah, the next day *did* suck, and it was hard to move, but I'd forgotten that the soreness the day after is kind of pleasant at times. The next workout was scheduled for Tuesday, and I knew that I wouldn't be recovered by then. I'd forgotten that I used to start exercise regimes on Thursdays, which gave me extra time to recover before my Sunday workout. It turned out not to matter. The Butt Montana, Esquire, was a bit more difficult than the first one had been, but I got through it and felt even better.
The next Butt Montana, Esquire, is scheduled for tomorrow. I feel good about it. The soreness took itself down a bunch of notches. It's still there, but after yesterday I'm more confident about the next attempt at working out.
I know I'm probably imagining things, but I think I'm seeing my muscle definition coming back. Already I can see my bicep roll again when I flex, and I have dimples at my shoulders again. Although my stomach muscles seem to be pushing my fat out a bit now. It wasn't doing that before. Weird.
I wish you could have seen me just ten years ago. I had fuckin' guns, man. Now I have skinny arms. My legs have also gotten skinny, especially the left one due to the brace, but there's nothing I can do about that. Soon I might be able to get my FOID card for the guns I'm gonna have. And I'm not gonna conceal-carry, either. I just might go full Mac from Sunny.
Yeah, the loose Butt Montana, Esquire, around my waist will probably never go away, but it would be nice to be in shape-ish again. Maybe I'll even crack 200 lbs, which I've never done as an adult. The lightest I've ever been is 205.
I'll never be able to say, "Just look at my glutes, what a perfect butt," as I have Nobuttatal, but that's OK. I'm feeling a li'l too optimistic, anyway. We'll see if I keep it up. Weird to be saying that about something not having to do with erections, but there you go.
For extra credit, check this out.
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