When I was a kid, all I ever really wanted out of life was to have a suit of armor in my bedroom. This passion came from horror movies and cartoons. Imagine my surprise when I went to my stepfather's parents' place, and they had a suit of armor. I thought it was the greatest thing ever.
Quick side story: Scary German Guy from Monster Squad always reminded me of my stepfather's dad. He looked older than SGG, but otherwise it was pretty spot on. He fought in WWII, and I'm not sure which side he fought on. When I was a kid he gave me a bunch of coins, and many of them were from Nazi Germany, swastika and all. I'm kinda hoping he just picked those up while he was there as mementos, but, well. Oddly enough, both he and my second stepmom's dad were in WWII, and they both lost the same finger, so they could do the magic trick where you slide your thumb down, pretending it's a finger, but they could do it really fucking well.
Anyway, I'd hang out around that suit of armor wondering if it was possible to convince them to part with it in the interest of granting a child's finest wish. Never happened. But they gave me a plastic army dude with a parachute, and the top of their staircase was the perfect spot to drop him. Poor bastard's parachute never fully opened, and he always dropped like a rock. But he got to die at the feet of a suit of armor, which I think he would have liked.
Fast forward to a few weeks ago. I had a bunch of shit to do, so I left home. As I was driving by the front I saw my neighbor from two doors down had a yard sale going on.
AND HE WAS SELLING A SUIT OF ARMOR!
I had to keep going on my way, but I vowed that if it was still there when I got back, I would buy it, no matter the price. Yeah, that's an irrational thought, especially since I don't really have all that much money, and I have no idea where I'd put a suit of armor in this cluttered house. But goddammit, I wanted that suit of armor.
Imagine my disappointment when I got home and saw it was gone. Motherfucker.
Fuck.
No comments:
Post a Comment