I've flirted with the idea of getting LASIK done for many, many years, but I don't think I'll ever do it. First of all, it's kind of weird to have someone shooting a laser into your eyes to do some good ol' fashioned eye-cutting. It was a scary concept to me, and years ago when I saw a video of Kid in the Hall Dave Foley getting it done, it did not help matters. If you're going to do that shit to me, you'd better knock me out first.
But I've had glasses since third grade. I would feel absolutely naked without them. I couldn't imagine going to bed at night and being able to see everything clearly. It would weird me out. And when it's raining, what if water goes directly into my eyes? My glasses prevent that from happening.
But then again, what if the zombie holocaust happens? Or a cannibal holocaust? Or both at the same time? If my glasses break, well, I have a back up pair that are almost as good. And if those break? I have a pretty shitty back up pair. And if those break? I'm fucked for the rest of my life. Which might not be that long. I remember my old doctor once saw me reading a Walking Dead book, and he said, "Do you know who doesn't survive the zombie apocalypse? Fat diabetics." Sure, a little mean, but it was on point. I am fat, and I am diabetic.
But I'm not a fan of stuff in my eyes, which is why I don't do contacts. My eye doctor, when dilating my eyes, has to pry my lids open to put the drops in. I would not do well with the Ludovico Treatment, for example. The scene in Fulci's Zombie? Yeah, you know the one I'm talking about. I first saw that at a young age, and it has stuck with me pretty clearly over the years.
So while it might be for the best, I'll probably never get it done even if I could afford it. That's OK with me.
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